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Sometimes, the way you handle things leaves me wondering if I've done something wrong so soon, or if this love is already doomed to fail before it really flies.

Am I just paranoid, due to all the attempts that seemed to fall down the gutter, without a chance at capturing them and rescuing them from the muck that clings to the sides?

You seem so distant to me, most of the time, like this thing is just a dream and I'll wake up and I won't know if I'll be sad or if I won't care at all.

You often ask me if I'm going to cry, and I can't help but think you're disappointed at the fact that I'm not the type of person who cries over people that don't seem to care as much about me.

Are you guarded, or just cold hearted? That's a question I know you'll never answer truthfully.

You pride yourself in what you don't disclose to me, and that if anything is the biggest red flag of them all.

Are relationships based off of sex ever going to stand the chance at a bright future? Or were we better off as friends that benefitted from needing each other on lonely nights and parting ways when the deeds were done, signed, sealed, and relieved until our next encounter.

Do I love you? Or do you fill the void of loneliness as I watch my friends cling to people of similar statures? Are we all destined to settle eventually?

Do you foresee yourself with me in the long run? Or do you feel you'll grow tired of my frustrations, insecurities, and stubborn ways? Do you feel like you'd ever swallow the pill, take the plunge, and build a world for you and I, harboring safe from any star storm that's sure to beg for a chance to tear us apart.

You don't seem real to me. As fake as your profile on tinder, and that seems strange and it seems stupid, but its a truth that needs to be let into the universe.

What are you hiding so desperately?

And why do you respond with anger when I tell you about the things that have made me who I am. Am I not someone you enjoy, even with my dark moments that I've grown from? Am I someone you merely tolerate and my dark moments lead you to the conclusion of, "So that's where things went wrong with you."

You baffle me.