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Seventh o' Many: Blasphemy, blasphe-you, blasphe-everybody! |
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Coming soon to a theatre near you:
The Passion of the Christ 2: Wrists of Fury! (He is risen, and He is pissed)
So I'm at karaoke last night, and my dear big brother Dietr has this lightning-flash moment of absolute blasphemy, the result of which you see above you and the full result may be included as an interlude if I can get him to give me a copy of the script he wrote last night.
That's right. He wrote a short skit to be the sequel to the Passion of the Christ. In it, Mary Magdalene breaks out into song ("You Sexy Thing" wink and while a mob of (sexy) Jews dance around, John the Baptists sprays them with a super-soaker. "You've been babe-tized!" he exclaimes.
Jesus flies around wearing nothing but a jet pack, makes a few odd remarks ("JESUS SMASH!" wink and Indiana Jones and Batman show up, just to show that this really is the last crusade. And to top it all off, a centurian remarks "You can't crucify a guy twice, can you? I mean, do you use the same holes?"
I laughed, I cried, I blasphemed.
Of course, it's all a ploy, really. We are due to choose a theme for our annual student-written and -produced show tomorrow, and in order for the group to choose the theme he wants, he plans on producing this script as a sort of ... well, diversionary tactic. You know, like when you tell your parents that you want to get a tattoo of two tarantulas mating... on your face... with an egg sac at the back of your head so that when you shave your head it's visible... and describe it all in full detail, and then when they reach the height of their disgust and horror and say "Absolutely not!" you say, "Oh, well, can I take the car to Minneapolis this weekend to see the Pixies?" which doesn't sound like anything in comparison, so of course they agree.
I admire his tactics, the more so because I agree that his theme would rock.
Comic Link: Nekobox = so damn cute
Brain thinky: 2897. Inside every sane person, there's a madman struggling to get out.
Adeiras · Thu Sep 30, 2004 @ 11:52pm · 0 Comments |
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