So recently I've been meaning to vent. And what place better than on here? I don't never like deleting what I write if its a journal entry. Most of the time though I throw away tons of writing every week, be it short stories or other things. But journal entries where I vent for some reason I do not throw away. I guess because its another part of me... I also enough typing the things that go on in my mind very much.. Its like, my thoughts are just racing onto the screen and I can physically see whats going on inside my mind... I also enjoy the fact and thats why I learned and forced myself to be able to type at very fast paces so that my mind doesn't let the words that i'm thinking in my head escape. But sadly, the mind will always win. because as you improve in one field the other improves just as much. Recently. I"ve been having to think of a new AMV i should do. Obviously, because of my new obsecion, its going to be a haruka and michiru video. I'm also going to try my best and continue writing as much as I can. Keep myself as busy as possible so I won't have to sort of deal with the thoughts of reality... You know, I never really realized it, but I act too much like Haruka Tenoh.. I mean, not exactly because she really does handle her life a lot more differently than I do. But, just as she ran away from her destiny by trying to catch speed, I'm trying to run away from the truth of matters by keeping other things in front of me that I can work on. Its sad and its lonely and hurtful because the pain of what the confrontation is about is just so over whelming and not going anywhere unless the problem is given attention and acknowledged. But there is also the feat of what other pain could there be after you've come out with what you wanted to talk about. Would you have to deal with a pain much greater than that? And the questions continue to float inside your head until so much time goes by that you really cannot infer anything good will really come out of it. And the choices you would have had before when the situation was young and fresh probably look much better than the smut youre dealing with now.
Kaz_Nara Community Member 
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