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C.F.S called Jordan and josie, and they talked. awhile later, jordan broke down, he stood in his room crying. josie tried comforting him but nothing workd. then josies mom talked to her and she told josie to call me. she said i had every right to know wut happend. *...*
ok..
so josie called me. my mom answerd and she called for me to pick it up. i answerd the phone, and josie asked if i could come over, and she said it was an emergency. so my mom dropd me off at her house immediatly. when i got there i knew something big happend, it was just so obvious. the atmosphere was just plain dead. so as i opend the porch door and went into the house, i saw josie sitting in the living room with everybody except for jordan. i smiled when she looked at me but i felt like she was about to tell me something horrible. so i asked her "what happend? whats the emergency?"
her smile was weak, like she was forcing it, but she said calmly "..jordan needs you right now... hes in the room..." i looked at her puzzled, and asked "..okay... so.. should i go see him?" and then she bursted into tears. she hugged me and cried. she kept saying she was sorry, and she wished it never happend. i didn't know what she was talking about then Claire came up to me and took her. and she said to me " go see jordan.." so slowly.. i went towards the room. all i could do was nod at everyone an continued towards the room.
when i got to jordan and josies room, i saw jordan. he was looking at old pictures, and i could tell he was crying. i went up to him, and said quietly "are you alright..?" then he looked at me, and just grabbd me and held me in his arms. i was shocked, and alittle scared, but he quietly cried on my shoulder. he kept mumbling words, but i couldn't understand him. then he cleared his throat, looked me in my eyes and said as best as he could...
"did you know devon went to selkirk?..." i smiled alittle and said "yeah... he came over before he left.. he hugged me like how ur holding me before he mentioned anything about leaving.. why? he'll be back in august. so thers nothing to worry about! ^w^ " then jordan put his hands on my face, and said quietly... "..devon... didn't make it..... to selkirk...." he trailed off. i looked at him trying to figure owt what he meant, and i said "..why? they send him somewere else?" i tried smiling, but i could slowly feel a huge lump in the back of my throat as i listend to jordan as he looked me in my eyes and continued "Cynt... i know your dense.. but listen. ..." he held back his tears and said again "devon... didnt.. make it to selkirk... the car.. they lost control of the car.... cynt... devons gone. . ."

..then. my world came crashing down. i shook his hands off my face, and i backed away. i shook my head, and said to him "what... No... No! your lying!! ...devons okay! hes fine! hes... hes fine! hes at selkirk right now! being happy! hes... hes..." jordan didn't know wut else to say.. so he just looked at me. tears coming down his face as he knew i was slowly realizing that what he said was true. i stood in the door way shaking. i felt my eyes burning as tears were blocking my view. i kept trying to deny it, but i suddenly knew why everyone else was so upset... why the atmosphere was dead.. i couldn't take it anymore so i ran. i turned around and just ran out the door. yelling out to jordan calling him a liar. i ran. josie and everyone else just watched. i wasn't wearing any shoes, i just kept runing. i ran until my lungs burned, until it was hard to breathe. i kept seeing devons face in my memory... i cried and screamed. then someone came from behind me and i heard a voice... a very familiar voice..

"..cynt.. don't cry... please... i'll come see you again. i promise. august isn't that far away... i love you."

i turned around and i was face to face with him. smiling at me, he said

"your perfect. just the way you are. please don't cry.. please show me that smile again... please.. don't be sad cynt.."

i cried as i said to him "i miss you.. so much... please don't leave me.. please... its so hard... its hard trying to smile.. hiding.... please.. come back to me..." he reached owt for me, and held me in his arms... i closed my eyes.. then...

..i woke up.