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Royal and I broke up. Want to know why? My perfect guy is not, in fact, a guy. He is really a she, and she and I are both perfectly straight. At least, I think I'm straight. Recent events have made me question my sexual orientation, but I've never found myself staring at girls. No, I only ogle hot guys.

So how did this happen to me? Here's the story as I got it from Royal. She originally did it as "joke," to see what she could do as a guy. She told me that she then found out that I was "cool" and didn't want to break up with me because that would hurt my feelings. I find that slightly bogus, considering I broke up with her the first time. Anyways, she continued to pose as a guy for seven months. SEVEN FREAKING MONTHS!!!!!! Anyways, she finally told me the truth last night. A lot of what she's said to me in a romantic way, such as claiming she wanted to sleep with me, was said to help her guy facade.

This would all be easier for me if she hadn't managed to pose as my perfect guy. It's like, out of all the people she could have picked to play a trick on, she had to pick me. Oh well. Ugh. It hurts, though. One of my biggest fears is that no guy could possibly love me. Royal was my one "shining star," so to speak. She was supposedly proof that a guy could love me. What does this mean for me now? I don't know. I think I'm just going to go crawl into a corner and cry..... crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying

Until next time,

~Kaggie-chan