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As you may or not know, my secret superhero identity is Da' Phunk Samurai. Back in my younger days, when I was much quicker and stronger, and I had to face Tom Cruise. So, it started one day, when I was picking up a hamburger. I was paying for my hamburger, and then I asked for some coffee. I payed for the coffee as well. As I was walking out the door of the restaraunt I was picking my hamburger up in, Tom Cruise bumped into me. I accidentally spilled all of my steaming hot coffee on Tom Cruise's, er, lap. He screamed like a little girl. Then he said: "You are so dead." So I started running away, but he used his witchcraft and got a head of me. And then he shocked me with his lightning attack. "Ow!" I screamed, helpless to defend myself. And then I attacked Tom Cruised with my katana. And then he pulled out his. and then we battled for hours on end. Then we agreed to a duel to the death soon, since we were so evenly matched.

Well, that's the end of Part I. How'd ya like it?