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Aha, another journal of tsukaza519~. Well this is what I'm thinking pretty much or whatever. I actually am depressed right now. I feel that my friends are separating from me. For example, Britt for not liking being depressed. (sorry to say "Britt" wink . Plus the fact that I'm moving to another town and county. They think that I won't be friends with them, but they have to realize that they're going to soon end up somewhere in life. I mean, I can't stay in one place really, I got to think about my life, and you have to just accept me moving. I'll even be able to hang out with those friends. Even if I did stay where I'm at and didn't move, I'd still end up moving. I'm maturing a lot now, trying to be a normal human being which people say I'm not. I wish there was a life full of love. I mean I don't really care if anyone messes with me, plays pranks on me, or even insults me or makes fun of me. I'm not a child anymore, I'm becoming a responsible adult, soon I'll be 18, on my way to start my adult life. My cousin hates me now only because I'm maturing. It's a natural thing. But, really, if you do plan on doing something stupid and immature to me, there's really no point in doing that, I'm not going to care about it. Do that to someone else, even though I wouldn't recommend doing that to anyone or at all. Still depressed. For peeps who are like 10-14 or even 15 (i guess), enjoy your child life while you still can, don't think about your future till your like 16 at least but I would choose 17-19. The reason I'm depressed is that I'm already thinking about my future life and seeing how it's all going to end up being. I seem like a boring guy, at least that's what people say and that's what their body language says. I'm just going through tough things, my life now, my grandfather dying above me, my grandmother dead, my friends committing suicide. That doesn't mean I'm going to commit suicide. It's just really sad having someone dying under your own roof. Sorry for people who are non religion type of people or don't believe in any kind of God, but I know that the Lord is with me all the way to the end. I do have some friends who are happy still to be friends with me no matter what. Even my brother, who has helped me throughout my life, I thank him a lot for doing that. My mom, wow, we have fought a lot, and i thought we weren't getting along at all, but I feel that I have a closer connection with my mom. (for people who are immature, it's not like that, so just shut your mouth, seriously) She has problems almost similar to me as well. After typing all this still makes me depressed. (I'm not going to commit suicide. So, don't be worried about that.) If only life could be full of happiness. Well, that's pretty much what's going on in my mind and my life.

P.S- If you think I really need counseling, I really don't need it, I'm a personal counselor myself, plus I have my brother. So, I'm covered on that.