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tome of the white shadow of the black bird
this is a note of all i think about about and i dont care who see this because i will most likely never see you in my life and coment stuff about your self too(oh and im (dis-leck-sick) so i dont always word thins right so will go and re-word it)
somthing new


hmm nothing really new. my baby is now wishing she could kill her mother. sad
no one cares to listen to a now 5yr. her mother has her scared to speak out. mad
its so irritating. well babys in school now she seems to like it. tho it difficult to arrange
playdates for her. no ones ever free.

nothing really new in my life. just trying to keep an income
still single. it seems every girls either a tranny or feminazi now. stare
i want a girl as a petite as i am, who know how to cook that not ugly or too old
to have children stressed its rather frustrating.

i started stock trading to gain a passive income. 2 of my stock i spent a lot of money
on revers split while i was working! stressed i lost 180$. im trying to make it back
but its difficult. iv made back 20$ so far and managed to get enough to gain a monthly
dividend of 3$ confused i gotta get that amount up to 200$ a month. im mostly swing trading
but having so little money im only making 2 and 3$ profits every few weeks to a month crying

anyways heres an adventure i had in skyrim online
copy to a note to read it is long


so i had happened to a guy who hired me to collect an artifact from frost trolls.
during the venture with frost trolls i find some elf girl who was trapped in the mine by some deity because she wouldnt leave her husband for him and had been for a few thousand years. so help her escape her prison. where she decides to hag out with the guy who sent me on the quest because is a scholar of this era and she needs a update of the world to start her life over cus shes not dead. the scholar then had me deliver a msg to an elf king. he was a rather chill and easy going king. the king sent me to talk to his son who sent me to find the kings adviser who abruptly left for an unknown reason. so she can come back and preform a ceremony for the queen to prove to wood elfs that she is Worthy of becoming queen. the trip took a few days to reach her last know where abouts where i met a general who was with the advisor who happens to be in charge of a small battalion. so taking he didn't want to risk anymore men sent me to find his scouts in a city that looked to be under siege. when i got in there everyone was acting crazy and murdering each other. within the walls of that small City I find the advisor who decides to help me find the scouts. she has kind of an attitude like she doesn't care what's going on but she wants to fix it. so we find the scouts 2 went crazy and we learn one is going to be cooked for the town's dinner. the advisor says we need to go to her house to go get some scroll to open the door to where the demon guy was.I end up having to emerger pretty much all the townsfolk cuz every time they saw me they tried to kill me. anyway it turns out some demon Lord guy of chaos took over the town because the mayor was an attention whore and wanted everybody to love him more cuz he was retarded. turns out the adviser was possessed by the demon guy so then when we get to the mayor the demon guy comes out and teleports us to a jail. so then claiming that he's bored sends us to go through his magically created labyrinth to find and kill the mayor. so then once I get tothe center where the mayor is supposed to be the demon guy pops out he starts raving about some dilemma between free will and freedom and a choice. so then he gives me the choice between free will and pulling a lever. so thinking that even guys funny cuz he's crazy I decide to choose free. will he goes on raving on about his friend and it turns out free will was his friend who's a giant troll frog so then I got to murder him. after I do the demon guy gets all gitty with himself over it says he will miss his friend but the battle was so fun. he then pulls the lever that he was next to and the door opens and there's the mayor. then we get teleported to the main floor. So instead of killing the mayor I convinced him to convince the demon guy to take him back to his world. cuz the mayor is crazy was given the power to make everybody else crazy. the mayor figures in a world of chaos is power would be better and more fun for both of them so demon guy teleported them where he lives. says he's happy he gets to take his favorite friend with him and says don't worry he still likes us and to come visit him some time to have more fun. then everything goes back to normal and the soldiers stay behind to help fix the town. we get back to the palace where that wierd ceremony takes place. then because I was the one who got the relic they decide that I have to use it to perform in the ritual which is the push 3 buttons. The relic makes you have Shadow clones of yourself so I was able to be in three places at one time. after the giant contraption turns on the prince then runs in there saying I have to test it out for you sister and if it works for me I get to be the king of the entire kingdom. after the guy goes in there he turns into another giant frog looking troll thing that's was bigger than the first one I fought and then he gets pissed off over it and uses magic to paralyze everyone and says ******** it I'm going to kill everyone since it didn't work. so I Shadow clone so I'm not trapped in there anymore and I murder him after if which the spells broken. the queen goes in there and she comes out back out normal and says wow I guess I am fit to be Queen of the entire kingdom. she exclaims that she's going to make an excuse for her brother to where he tried to save everyone and died. then when I talk to the king he's all "the prince died trying to protect everyone this is such a tragedy" followed by "how did that sound cuz I'm going to have to be saying this for the rest of my life" so then the kingdom had a new empress to rule everyone and then I looted the body and left cuz there's nothing else to do. the prince only had like 10 gold on him.
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gaia journal 06/06/18
hello gaia journal,
seems all my friends here have died of this site. situations annoying. baby hates her
mother and her mother just wants to force her to visit over night now. that poor baby has now started counting the days she has left at home till she has
to go visit again. she just wont understand that forcing the baby to with her
will only make baby despise her . . . . my poor babys 4 now.

its annoying my family refuses to clean up after themselfs
so most of my time is spent cleaning my home while im home instead of mostly being spent playing with her. stare i really wish my stupid mother would have let my gf live with me instead my babys mother, then my baby would have been born to someone who actually listed to house rules and understood money isnt unlimited. who had good hygiene stare

other then this annoying baby momma drama and court crap. iv been playing a bunch of cell phone games. my most invested game is star rings z-girls. its base
building game set in a zombie apocalyptic world and all the graphics are
cute anime girl themed. xD

i left my old city (server) to join the newer one and started my own clan
we were the " borg legion". i would send other clans the message
"we are the borg. we seek your assimilation to our collective or your destruction resistance is futile. will you comply..." when they declined or didnt answer we destroyed there clan. 4laugh oh the fun of it. in a months time we went from bottom tier rank to the rank 20th clan. since then we we merged into "elegant destruction"
were i took over as and brought the clan up to rank 15. we no call ae selfs the "threshold legion" i may have missed typed the threshold word or what not but the word my clan mate described it as was as of a necromancer type army made up of collected solders from defeated armys. were now rank 13 and climbing the latter up to top rank. but it will difficult to get past the top 5 clans. they const of base lvl 18-30s. my current lvl and base 16. my other member range from 10-18. we got a ways to go. but we managed to up there being weaker then most others through are determination and strategys and tactics. if only other things were just as simple.. . .

still working at the same place trying to make a schedule that allows me a livable wage and ample time with my baby but its proving difficult at my current standing
i need just 1100$ to live. but other bills not related to cost of living keep coming up
its ridiculous my mother expects me to be a full time stay at home parent but to also
hold a job. stare her logic is so flawed and annoying. i wish babys mother wasn't
so toxic, neglectful, lazy and one sided, so i could have the kind of help id need.

all this annoying garbage because she wanted me to commit walfer frad with her
and an apartment she refused to change into are name. and her excuse for
not wanting to change the lease was because the rent would have got up by 20$
twenty measly dollars stressed there would have been two ppl paying the rent
with enough money to cover the cost of living for 3 ppl

well im still single. no possible gfs. its not vary easy to make friends. i dont want to be a couch potato and i dont care for sex and drugs or have excessive funds to waste. then theres still ppl only really care to hang out with those they went to high school with.


03/18/2017
dear journal on gaia,
finally got to come sit on my computer for a bit
i nvr have much to do ever mostly just work and caring for baby squirt.
still single. tho iv made a new friend to out with (she kinda feels the same as baby mother so i dont think she'll be a good spouse stare the point of finding a new spouse is to upgrade not go back to the same garbage in different package).
iv got my own apartment for the time being, smile its nice. my ex that moved to texas moved back last year. im vary disappointed, shes no longer a suitable spouse especially now iv got baby, she clames to have slowed down her lifestyle but shes shes a heavy alcoholic, started smoking pot heavily and is a chain smoker. she also has a baby that she got taken away from her due her ex and how she carries her self now stare
and now that shes over weight and mentally ruined mother liked her as gf material.
that is untill she saw shes still friends with my babys mom on fb rolleyes

neutral nothing to do but keep myself afloat. babys 3 now her lil baby personality is
so cute. we make crafts and watch cartoons together. we love shimmer and shine, paw patrol, and Daniel tigers neighborhood. she like some of the shows i like, like pokemon, my little pony friendship is magic, and baby likes yugioh omg XD

i rented trolls and moanna the other day. i love the start of trolls when poppys singing her "get back up again" song being all happy as stuff trys to eat her xD shes my favorite now. moanna definitely lived up to its hype. me and baby have seen in theaters baby just sat in my lap the whole time and just watched it with out making a fuss.


Awake so late and board
Hello gaia Journal it's been a while.
Things are mostly boring still no gf. Last one I had moved to Texas cuz we both became homeless for a bit and mother wouldn't help us out >_> she was so cute and shorter then me! I'm still kinda peeved about it took about 2 years to win her over...
Nothing really exciting going on last year I got to attend an
Ingress anomaly (I'm ENL agent name BlkDov) my faction
Won. It was fun being around ppl with my same interest.
It sucks to struggle to keep any kind of hobbie I want.
Iv got a salary of 12.24$ an hour now. I'm hoping to get this new place and a new job that would give a more viable income. I managed to get a car finally but then being microns letting mother use it while left with my bff for the weekend I come back to find my car because she let her now ex bf have it. A month later when I finally get it back it ******** broken, undrivable and I had to pay out 350$ miss work to retrieve it from an impound lot. And mother won't just let me fix it. >_> I feel she did this purposely since she won't let me have my key. I did decide to treat myself. So bought a 2ND hand recast bjd.she turns out to much cuter then her image online. I got a great deal too
She was (including shipping) just 100$ she has a vary attractive face up and body blushing. With fantasy parts that make her be a fox girl with 2outfits and vary pretty long black hair wig. Soon when I get the 126$ I'm buy her a suit case from the luts web page for to live in like Rosen maiden! Hehehe seeing those I just have to get one there so cute. Well I hope today is better then the last few weekends.

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hello old journal
Dear old journal I half forgot about.
So its been a while. Theres been quite a bit going on
Lets see I found a few gfs whom broke up with cus I refused to put out while only knowing them for a few weeks, one apparently had been cheating and has a baby, later down the line I find my old bf who liked quite a bit but she now a slut who only called me to keep her company when she wasnt screwing around
Thats no longer my friend cus I accidentally got her in trouble for cheating on her gf, then I got my job thst iv had now for 7yrs? Whom like to screw over there employees and act hella shadey.
So I did mange to find a few gfs whom left me cus I wouldn't put out after knowing them for only few weeks.found a another gf whom makes a good bf but is crazy and got me kicked from each place I rented from cus she couldnt just get a job s**t happens she moves away for a year, I get new friends one of whom is awesome who's mother appointed me his father 0.o my ex k moves back, I find a new gf that I have 4 6 months shes that I really like then s**t happens and we both lose are homes my mother's a b***h so she moves to texas for a year and waits too long to tell me she wants to be with me again cus out depression I go party till I wanna go to sleep when my bf (whoms my ex) decides she wantz to rape me. . She informs me she preggers and had plans to nvr tell me about baby cus inspite of her liking me she hates me >_> but desided to stay instead. Which is the day before I get the call from the girl I had been waiting for! Witch kills me to inform her of what happened (so iv got the sweet 1yr old baby girl iv always wanted but its with dipshit of a cow who dosent actually want to be a parent so im technically a single parent. Oh I also have a 3ds now and im addicted to ingress im just a few days from a gold soljorner medal

OMFG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
omfg!! im so ******** disapointed and pissed.
yeaterday i get a call from this girls mom
saying nvr talk to my daughter again cus shes only 17 and asking if
i was the one who bought her booze

scream what hell!!!! here i thought i finally found an awesome girl to
be with and now i dont get have her. i had met about a week or 2 ago
and gave her my number w/e thinking ill nvr get a call back
then on satrday i get a call cus she wants to hang out
she told me monday was her 18th bday stare and that she had job
she had also said she like to work out so she would have stayed
thin like i want forver!!!! gonk

but no she had to lie and pissed off her ******** mother by haveing booze!!!!!!!! scream why the ******** is this s**t always happening
for the time in months a pretty girl has an intreste in me
but no she had to be a ******** lier!!! i really ******** hate being 23
no one ******** wants you unless they think youll get them crap!!!!!!!!
stressed

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[img:4999cbc131]http://i29.photobucket.com/albums/c288/whiteshadowoftheblackbird/sig.jpg[/img:4999cbc131]

stupedness
-_- why the hell are all the super pretty girls ******** drugys!!!!
who only want the dam scrum bags. ********!!! scream
i realy hate this place and theres only one other palce i can
go but i dont really want to go there scream

iv broken up with my gf she moved away to ocean side
i learn that a 5ft smaller then me petite hindu girl likes
she also agreed to go hang out with me
but then i cant handle living with my ******** family
and theres no way i can get my own place since
they put they in debt scream

stressed i can eather go live with my currant ex in ocaen side
or stay with my fam and have no freedom

be misrable with a girl i dont really want
or be misriable with my dam family

have massive stress with my fam and possibly new pretty gf
or have massive stress with my ex and freedom

they really make me want to leave
but then my memeory with her make me want to stay
stressed

gaaaaa!!!! i really wish i had friends i can go live with stressed
i really really wish every one would have stayed out of my way all them ******** years ago. i had the perfact girl who knew her place
who knew how to take care of a house hold
who would have helped and supported me as
i would have helped and supported her


2:25am 012010
i just dont know. every thing feels like a distraction.
and that its forced xp i just cant find what im looking for.
mabey ill never find it confused
sometimes memorys really do suck gonk
im tired


im so fuking pissed
i was riding my skatebord when a guy that look familler was said something im all what did you say? he was ganna say somthing
when his freind desided to show off so he was trying to act tough
asking if i had weed or booze then hes asking if i got any cash saying
bs about him repisenting the west side i think it was dude was so fake
then all trying to start a fight andi say "come on you cant honistly be that bord" then hes all ok then give me your skate bord i refuse
so then he come then fight me all the while hes bragging to his friends
how he so tough (wtf come on what retard) his friends all telling him come on dont start stuff, dont do that in front of my house. then the kid punches me in the face im was "what the ********" so i start walking away he walks to his friends and is bragging how he made my nose bleed so im walk away i get a block down im trying to get my nose to stop bleeding then i hear yelling behind me so i ignore it then i turn around cus i hear a bike and its that punk hes all "so youre just going to walk away come on fight me!" so now im walking back words keeping my eyes on him starting to get mad then hes gets up on me and start pushing me saying come on hit me i dare you then he punches me again
i take a firmer grip on my skate borde he hits me again saying fight me
hit me with your skateborde then some lil black kid comes up the street
he tells him hay wanna watch me beat this guy up then he comes up punches me again then he takes my food i got and throws it out
punches me again saying fight me come on. i dare you to hit me at that point im getting really mad im getting ready to start beating on him when a guy comes out of his house the kids all ph s**t the 4, 1 then runs off the ppl were nice they gave me water and a wet cloth for my nose then the cops come and an ambulace i get a ride in the ambulace i point out the house were the kid was hanging out at then im taken to hospital stare im still kinda pissed i wanna beat him up now dam punk
made me bleed up all on my new pants and my skete bored and now my bllod is splatterd all over the place scream evil

whiteshadowoftheblackbird
Community Member
whiteshadowoftheblackbird
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