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I hated it. Period.

We arrived at the theater pretty early. So early, in fact, that the previous showing hadn't ended, and we were left to pace the hallway with the guys waiting to clean up the theater. Across the way was the theater showing "Casino Royale". *sigh*

The previews started, most of which I can't remember, but the last one - "Epic Movie" - sent both my mom and me into fits of giggles that carried us into the prologue of Eragon.

Brom: ... something... something... "...astride mighty dragons..."

Me: *giggles* "I don't think I like that camera angle. The long dragon neck sticking out, swinging back and forth? It looks like a big p***s."

The movie moves through the opening battle sequence (Me: "A fantasy movie prologue with a massive battle sequence? I've never seen THAT before." wink and into the whole Arya-with-the-egg/Ergy-conveniently-goes-hunting-at-the-same-moment sequence.

The person behind me rudely kicked the back of my seat to shut me up at this point. Even though I was quiet, I couldn't help but notice other details.

Roran says something about leaving town to escape the Alagaesian version of the draft, and Uncle Garrow says some quaint words of wisdom in generic British accent #4. Eragon is sad, and stares at the sunset.

Me: "Shouldn't there be two suns setting?"

Why do the Urgals look like a group of Bikers coming down off a weekend binge with the Hell's Angels? I liked them better when they were called Uruk-Hai. Or Trollocs. Or Random Disposable Bad Guys #7 - #14.

I think the one part that irked me to no end was when Saphira crystalized Brom's grave into diamond. It looked like a crystal cow pie. Or a turtle shell. I also came to the conclusion that Brom's tomb is made of cubic zirconia.

Saphira's a cheap b***h, duh.

And then blah, blah, blah.... but not quite the end. We have one last shot of Galbatorix, sulking, before he picks up his sword and slashes through the map/curtain that is hiding..... DUN DUN DUUUUUUN!!!!..... His dragon! ZOMG! Does this mean sequel?
Finally, a weird griffin type creature shows up on the screen and some really crappy music begins.

But dude. Who the hell would put a dragon behind a ******** map?

Huh. I hated the movie, but loved the book. I wish they did more justice to Durza though. In the novel, I percieved him as one of those sexy badguys, but the movie had him where he looked like he got shot in the face with a paintball.

Ah well, now if only I can get my parent's to forgive me for wasting about 18 bucks...