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I've been devoting alot of thought to that recently...more than I probably should really...
Life has been seeming udderly pointless...and has only been bringing pain with brief moments of relief...

And then I suddenly find myself at random moments such as this...where I'm sitting in a chair, feeling sick to my stomach with phantom pains wishing it would all go away but knowing only one thing will take it all away...

People dont need me around
I know they dont need me I'm just their little toy
they look at my wrist and feel my upper arm
and scold me for doing those things to myself
because their toy is breaking...

and when I don't...they dont seem to notice a thing...
and they just play with their toy without realizing they're breaking it more...

Wishing for relief I sit here hoping the pain will go away by itself
and knowing it wont unless I do one of two things...
one would get me into alot of trouble
the other would bring great sadness to anyone I've ever associated myself with...
I'm having trouble deciding which one to pick...

That bottle of Tylenol isnt looking so bad right now...