I finally joined a dating site. It's been over a week since I met this guy named Eirin (pseudonym of course). He hasn't called back so I am moving on. The website gives me plenty to do. I even found some old friends from high school. Or aquaintences at least!
One of them I really like but I am not sure whether I should pursue them or just be friendly. The problem I have is I get too friendly too quick. I want that personal intimacy and I want it now. That is the core of my troubles with relationships. I only have a few friends. I can count them on one hand. It is truly sad. Co-workers do not count in my book. They secretly hate you and hope you get fired instead of them.
Tis the working circle of life. I have been trying to keep in touch with friends from high school. I promised Kaitsu back in middle school that we would always be friends. Even if you she forgot and moved on to other better friends. I suck people's energy and emotions. At least that is what I think. I still try to talk to Kito. We aren't best friends but I hope we are still friends nonetheless. I try to keep up with what she is doing and how life is treating her. I really do worry about her though. Is she eating ok? Does she sleep enough? Is she under too much stress?And the list goes on. I think of Austin and how he is doing. I wonder if Theo will ever change. . . .I guess instead of talking about OkCupid I got caught up in my loneliness and memories. I do that a lot lately as my life goes on to another year. My friends go to college, pursue careers, and dreams while I sit stuck in time watching them pass me by. I know no one reads this. It is just another virtual journal entry that will float in space and time never to be touched by another human soul. If by chance some curious alien happens to read it maybe they will laugh at my pitifulness. I guess I better clean the apartment and do the weekly budgeting. Plus Hal needs to be walked in a few minutes. >.<;;;; Ah well. At least I feel a little better.
OkCupid is a cool site and so far I have made 1 ally in 2 days.
 Zabethlyburn · Fri Jan 21, 2011 @ 03:04pm · 0 Comments |
