*Standing with the ninja's of Konoha* I'm putting all of my super special ultra-awesome Fanfiction writting skillz to work in writing this for my ever-awesome never fails to read my fanfics nee-chan... Xadnama! YAY! *whispers* I told you to cheer you idiots! *shouting again this time with the ninja's of Konoha* YAY! Ahem. Well, as it is my nee-chan's birthday today, April 19, I have decided to push aside all of my stories (random reveiwer 1: You haven't updated any of them in FOREVER!) *smaks random reveiwer with a frying pan and random reveiwer fall down* haha, and write this one-shot for my most wonderful big sister (whose not really older than me .) Anyway, enjoy!
DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN NARUTO OR ANY ANIMES! 'CAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT, I'VE TRIED TO HYPNOTIZE MANGAKA'S TO GIVE ME THE RIGHTS BUT THEY ALWAYS REFUSE!
Naruto sighed. It had been a whole week without Sasuke in the village (he was on a mission) and that meant a whole week without Naruto's favorite person there for him to bug and annoy. All of the pent up energy usually reserved for pranking and generally making a nusiance out of himself to keep Sasuke, who had only been in the village a meer year and a half since Naruto had brought him back, from being lonely due to his almost outcast status amongst the people their own age had began to grate on him. Even Sakura and Ino, who had once been Sasuke's biggest fangirls/supporters had turned on him after the truth of Naruto's injuries from the Valley of End battle had been leaked via one very drunken doctor who had treated Naruto,and, who by Naruto himself, had been sworn to secrecy. Naruto didn't hold any ill-will to the poor man who had immediately informed Naruto (now sober) of what he had accidentaly revealed after becoming drunken. Naruto himself had remembered a few very revealing moments while drunk too.
Naruto turned over on the grassy field which he had been lying on, as he once again sighed. Maybe a good prank would help him release some of his pent up energy. Smiling devilishly, Naruto began a checklist in his head of the information for his prank.
Person to prank: Jiraiya. The old Perv had been giving him a lot of trouble about "...being a prude and needing to get laid a few hundred times."
When: Tommorow morrning. He knew that old Ero-sennin was planning to get drunk off his rocker tonight due to a banning of Icha-Icha in the Hidden Mist Village. It seemed the Mizukage wasn't too fond of the little orange books.
What to do: A nice bucket of freezing cold water and some tar and feathers would do just fine.
How to get away: Run after getting photos. Not many people knew, but Naruto was an avid scrap-booker ever since he had become a genin.
Hiding place: Sasuke's house. The stuck up teme wouldn't mind, afterall, he wasn't home.
Naruto smiled again and ran to his house to gather the nessicary tools for his prank.
*Next morrning*
"JIRAIYA!" Tsunade shouted loudly. "What the heck happened to Naruto? How did he get like that!" she demanded, looking at Naruto who currently was staring into space, his newly accuired fox ears and tails swishing back and forth dreamily.
"It's all his fault! He tried to prank me while I was working on a jutsu to make the Mizukage realize how wonderful my books are! He smeared the seal for it and this happened! Worst part is, I don't know how to reverse it!" Jiraiya said back, glancing every so often at the little blonde he called his grandson.
Tsunade groaned and fished out a bottle of premium sake, uncorking it and taking a swig. 'Naruto is stuck as a fox and I have no idea how to change him back... what else could go wrong?' she thought as she heard a knock on the door. "Enter!" she called.
"Hey Hokage-sama, Team Eight repo-" Kiba began before sniffing the air and looking towards Naruto, his eyes glazed in apparent arousal. The Inuzuka male then lunged for Naruto, and got on top of him, humping his leg. Even worse, Naruto didn't fight back but instead moaned and leaned into the larger boy.
Jiraiya quickly pulled Kiba off of Naruto, noticing that Kurenai and Hinata were holding back a suprissingly viscious Shino from doing the same thing. As Kiba began thrashing, in his grip, Jiraiya tightened his grip on the boy. Tsunade had noticed that Kiba became crazed after sniffing the air and so, with the help of the other women and Jiraiya, secured chakra enforced face masks on both Shino and Kiba. About a minute later they stopped thrashing and returned to normal.
"Lady Hokage, what happened to Naruto?" Kiba asked, noticing the ears and tails, while thanking the Gods and Jiraiya for stoping him from doing somthing he would have regreted.
"Naruto accidentaly messed up a jutsu Jiraiya had been working on and ended up like this. Wanna give us some insight on the little scene with you and Shino going crazy?" Tsunade asked back, curious.
"Well, without going into too much detail, Naruto is in heat. Which, because one, he's not an Inuzuka, two, he's not female, and three, so far as I know he's human (which may not be true right now) shouldn't be possible. With him being in heat, almost every guy is going to be attracted to him. Not just ones with animalistic family backrounds like Shino and I. The only one's immune will be those who are married, asexual and or have a bond with him like a parent or grandparent." Kiba expalined as Shino nodded to valedate what the dog like boy had said.
"How long does a normal heat last?" Jiraiya asked.
"2-5 weeks, but this isn't a normal heat. This is Naruto, a boy, jinchuriki, the most unpredictable ninja ever, and this is Jutsu inflicted. I can't give you an approximate length." Kiba sighed.
Suddenly a voice spoke up. "I might be able to... "
Everyone swiviled towards Naruto, who was the source of the sound. But what they saw was not Naruto's pretty cerulian blue eyes, but Kyuubi's glowing red ones. Kyuubi/Naruto was panting after the little episode with Kiba, and he was sitting in a very provocative position.
"Kyuubi." Tsunade acknowledged the demon, who for all his power seemed very vunerable at the moment. "You have any time frame for us to go off of or information for us?"
"Yes, and you'll be very glad you were able to get that mutt off this body when you hear. One, I'd say the time frame is about 4 weeks, two, Naruto messed up that jutsu and it brought out his inner spirit animal, the fox, which has nothing to do with yours trutly thank you very much, which is the explination for the tails and ears and instincts. three, said spirit animal is submissive, which is why he's not trying to stick himself into anything that has a v****a, however, this also means Naruto's body is very vunerable to anything with a p***s... it also means he can..." Kyuubi whispered the last part very quietly.
"We didn't get that last part Kyuubi, wanna repeat it?" Tsunade asked.
"..." Kyuubi mumbled again.
"Kyuubi for Kami-sama's sake, just spit it out." Jiraiya said.
"HE CAN GET PREGNANT! HAPPY? HE CAN GET PREGNANT! I'll be the laughing stock of the Bijuu if this gets out!" Kyuubi/Naruto said, putting his face into his hands.
There was a tense silence as Kyuubi's words sunk in. Kiba paled to an ashen white as did Shino and they both fell on thier knee's thanking whatever was looking out for them up there for the presences of Jiraiya and the women, they could hardly imagen what would have happened should they have ended up actually doing it and getting Naruto pregnant.
"Kyuubi, is there any place you think Naruto's body would be safe till this ends?" Tsunade asked warily.
"Uchiha Sasuke's house. No one lives there besides Sasuke himself, it is big and open, Sasuke is out on a mission, and Sasuke, so far as I know, is asexual. So Naruto and myself should be quite safe there. I hope... " Kyuubi said unsurely.
"That, for all the things that could go wrong, is probably our best and only course..." Tsunade said, and then almost immediately took a long swig of her precious sake. "Team Eight, this is an absoulute secret. S-ranked. Kiba, Shino, because you two know where he will be, you will not be taking off those masks. They are specialy designed to let in food and water, but not scents, so it works out."
"I'll take Naruto to Uchiha's place then, I guess I'll just settle him in Sasuke's room and leave a note for our unsuspecting host." Jiraiya said.
"Alright. Dismissed." Tsunade commanded and they all walked away with the exception of Jiraiya who carried Naruto and shushinned away.
~Two days Later~
"Kyuubi~! I'm so hooootttt... make it go away...!" Whined Naruto as he squirmed on Sasuke's bed. Being there had not helped with his little 'problem' either. The scent of Sasuke invaded his every sense as he rolled around, searching for some modem of relief from the incesant heat that current plauged his body.
"Sorry Kit, I'm in the same position as you at the moment. The heat is killing both of us." Kyuubi told him from the inside.
A door slamed somewhere in the house, and Naruto's sweat drenched head shot up. 'Sasuke?' he thought to himself.
There was a short silence and then a string of curses and stomping through the house before the door to the room Naruto was in was flung open and there, a little beat up and sweaty was Uchiha Sasuke, back from his mission. His eyes roamed over Naruto's form, drinking in every heated morssel till he reached the blondes gorgeous blue eyes, glazed over in lust.
"Naruto... you're..." Sasuke couldn't even finish his sentence before his eyes too glazed over and he grew a predatory smirk, one of a wolf about to get his catch. His little rabbit.
Kyuubi recognized the look immediately and took over "Now now Sasuke, don't jump to do anything ahem out of character now..." he squeaked, getting off the Uchiha's bed and backing towards a wall.
"Demo, boku no kawaii kitsune, where would be the fun in that?" Sasuke said as he stalked towards the ever retreating Kitsune, licking his lips as he did so. "Come now Kyuubi, why don't you give control back to Naruto, and he and I can have some friendly fun?"
"Sasuke-san, don't do somthing you're gonna regret... 'cause I have one thing to tell you, Naruto can get pregnant and you don't want that so why dont you just leave the room slowly and we will go to the forest and you wont have to see us for a while ok?" Kyuubi looked up into Sasuke's eyes hoping for some sign that Naruto wasn't going to be raped. Sadly, when he did look up, he saw that somthing had snapped in Sasuke's brain.
Sasuke pounced on his poor Kitsune, and Kyuubi retreated back into his cage, leaving Naruto to deal with the horny, possesive Uchiha. Sasuke, on his part, began kissing the blonde senseless. "You *kiss* don't *kiss* know *kiss* just how long *kiss* I've waited *kiss* to ******** you *kiss* and on top of that you can get pregnant *Deep Kiss* You are so perfect Naruto." Sasuke said between kisses.
That, brought Naruto back to reality if only for a moment. "You've always wanted this?" he asked.
"Yes, and that's why I've been going on so many missions, the more I'm around you the more I feel I can't hold back the feelings I have for you..." Sasuke replied.
"Sasuke..." Naruto said, his face going red from embaressment that his former teammate felt that way about him.
"Now where were we?" Sasuke grinned once more and layed on top of him... (An: as this is already bordering on M, I think that will end there. maybe I'll write an alternate ending later..)
~Next Day~
"Nee~ Naruto, can you let Kyuubi out for a minute?" Sasuke asked his blonde lover as he twirled strands of the blonde locks between his fingers.
"Sure Sasu." said Naruto as he switched out with Kyuubi. "Yes Sasu-san?" asked Kyuubi.
"Is Naruto really pregnant?" Sasuke asked.
"Yes, he's carrying a kit... so you better treat him right." Kyuubi warned.
"Yes ma'am." He told Kyuubi as Naruto's consieous slid back into place.
"So I'm pregnant huh..." Naruto mused aloud and Sasuke pulled him close.
"Yes you are Uchiha Naruto, yes you are." Sasuke replied and they both settled in to sleep again.
That is, until they heard noise from the hall.
"I told you this is Sasuke's room! I brought the gaki here!" That was Jiraiya the Super pervert.
"I swear if Naruto is not a virgin on the other side of this door, someone is getting their balls chopped off." Sakura's voice threatened and Sasuke visibly paled.
"If Naruto is pregnant then the daddy better start running. Now." Came the twin voices of Hinata and Neji, venom dripping on every word. It was more than enough warning for Sasuke who took off like a bat out of hell.
The door was busted open to reveal a Semi-naked Naruto with hickeys all up and down his body and the obvious smell of sex in the air. Gaara twitched.
"Which way did the little s**t go Naruto." Tsunade asked. Knowing better then to fight with her, he pointed out the window Sasuke had jumped through.
All of the ninja began pouring out of said window shouting "GET HIM!" and they all lived happily ever after... you wish...
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