My life, slowly but surely, seems to be going down down down! I just don't know what to do.
Not being able to talk to my Papi has been bad enough as it is. It's only been 4 days, but it feels like an eternity. All of my other crushes are getting on my nerves as well. I hate my heart and what it puts me through.
Next is me busting my tail off trying to bring my grades up, or keeping them up. School work just keeps piling up and up. I may not clearly see it just thinking about all the stuff I had to do, but if I made a list, it would be a mile long.
Swim practice hasn't been in 3 days, which is ticking me off more than anything. Wednesday, Friday and today! It will make me even more pissy if it's canceled this Wednesday again! I've been eating my calories required to be able to burn and not starve myself, and I'm afraid it's starting to backfire and I'm gaining a few.
My relationship with God is still not where I want it to be, and that's something I secretly struggle with from day to day. It slowly consumes me in a silent, deathly pain and sorrow.
Just today, it flooded all over in the area around where I live. My dad's shop was flooded over, only half of the building was visible. For you people who knows what happens when a car gets flooded over, yeah. Half of his inventory sunk under a brown mush of water. That will probably make our financial income go down. I never really thought that money was a concern for us sometimes, but from how my dad sounded, it might become that way, especially if it keeps raining like its said to be. At least for the next month or so.
I've just been feeling dead since Friday. Yeah, I've laughed with my friends, laughed at a joke in class, but over all I feel like a piece of crap. I'm praying that God will continue to let me love, like he loves me, and to help me pull through this with a few bruises. I know He'll pull through in the end, I just hope that end to this trial is soon...
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