Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

okay so this is a song/music video idea i came up with because of the "friends" i hang out with and how they keep asking me who I feel and i keep feeling stupid after i say how i feel. hope ppl enjoy it...i got rights to it. its mine, its original as far as i know....so yeah..no copying it.m'kay.

(17 teen year old girl surrounded by friends, laughing and being happy.Enter new person, girl's face hardens ans she smiles, walking off. Carma focuses on girl as she walks,looking sad and hurt as she begins to sing)
How many times must I tell you?
How long must I walk off alone and abandoned?
The lingering scars of hurt and betrayal dace upon my soul.
(girl stops, looking at her reflection from a window)
Am I really that much of a pain?
Am I not your friend?
Do you think me as your toy?
Can I do anymore to be your friend?
Must I submit and embrace this hurt you give me?
(girl sighs, eyes cast down as she fades and a memory of her plays out.She and friends chatting away as the same person as before walks over.)
I thought we were so close
(girl and friends chat happily with new person)
Until I realized I was fading from your eyes.
(girl watches as friends and person talk leaving her out)
I tried to pretend I was okay
(girl smiles forcefully at her friends and person)
But that feeling of abandonment hit me hard as you got up and left me alone.
(friends and person walk off leaving girl alone)
(present: girl leaning against wall watches memories of her as friends and person leave her again and again)
I stood by watching as I was left alone,left alone, left alone
again and again feeling the stabbing knives in my back,
I felt you betray me with content.
(girl walks, hidden, watching her friends and person)
Sure, maybe you didn't know
Maybe it was a mistake and accident
If I had told you things may have been different.
Yet talking was out before I could talk.
You'd made that so clear
(memory of girl getting yelled at by friends as she tried to talk to a few of them)
No more drama! No more words of guilt!
I'm sorry my feelings made you feel this way.
(girl pressed against wall in defeat, slams her fist against the wall, posture changes to aggressive)
Don't go blaming me, when I tried to talk!
Don't go accusing me when I put the effort to ignore it!
Talking trash behind my back!
Don't got the guts to talk in front of me!
I respected you and your choice
I tired my hardest to being fukin nice.
So excuse me, excuse me.
If I've given up on this now that you've decided to act on it.
Telling me to quit being childish,
I don't got that thing that makes you drawn
Looking at me with the stares of pity.
Saying it effects the group
When last we spoke I faded in the background.
(girl, pushes off the wall stalks away as her friends notice her and rush after her)
Well woop-dee-fukin-do, its now effecting you!
(one of girl's friends reaches out, grabbing her shoulder, forcing her to turn around and face them)
You want to resolve this conflict NOW
accusing me of noncompliance, not putting an effort
(girl glares at friends, standing stiff with tears in eyes)
Maybe you're right, I am of noncompliance
After months of trying I'd stopped.
Left with your supposed promise of friendship
I'd just given up.
(friend reaches out watching sadly as girl flinches away)
But now you're trying to resolve my conflict
Shoving me in a corner, pressuring me.
Blaming me for not talking care of it.
(girl with tears in her eyes)
I reaches out so many times to you
I ignored it for so long just for you
Yet all I got when I cried out was
No more drama!No more guilt! We're done with it!
(girl wipes away tears, tossing a book to them)
Forgive me, if I tried to let you in
For trying to resolve it without your help
I should have know to wait on you!
(friends open book- flipping though they see pictures of them all slowly changing to just pictures of them and person.)(friends look sadly at girl)
How could you have know?
You had deal ears as I cried out for you
How could you have seen?
I was fading and you were blind to it.
(girl turns away in defeat)
I let it happen, I did as you wanted me to.
I submitted to your will.Did as you bid me farewell.
I can't turn back the clock.
I'm sorry you feel guilty when I talk.
But don't think for a moment this is because I feel abandoned.
Its past that point you hypocrites.
(girl walks away slowly whispering sadly)
So I'll just leave
So I'll just go.
(girl vanishes, friends turn walking back to person)
And just stay away from you....