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Sitting here I think to myself,
I think about the things that's happened,
The things that go on in this world,
The people that are in it,
And the things these people have done.
Look at where we are now compared to where we've been.
Is it any better or are we in the same spot?
Or could it be that we are worse and just not know it?
I hear these words you say to me when we speak,
But what do you really mean?
I'm begining to think that you don't even know.
I know now that what I said to you was true and I won't forget it,
I could never forget you and what you've done for me,
The one who pulled me out before I was done,
The one who reached his hand out when no one else would,
You didn't care then if we ended up lovers,
You just cared about me and wanted me there.
We took those steps into being together,
Look at where we are now.
Is it any better, or is it worse?
We about lost our friendship that we held so dear,
The thing we never let go off for each other because that was all we had.
I know when I sit and think about it those are fond memories.
Are they for you?
I listen to your words on the other end of the phone,
You think I don't listen but I really do,
I listen more then most think,
In that I don't understand why.
One day I know you'll understand as I do in these things that's happened in my life,
Whether that be soon or come a later day,
You won't be happy with me soon for some words that I can not say,
But those words are for me until I can put them together.
The words like a puzzle that constantly sit and float in the mind,
You try to put them together but a shakey hand just doesn't work right,
But what makes it shake to begin with?
Mine is the uncertianity of the things I've been through,
The uncertianity of the things that are yet to come.
I want to live my life the way to make me happy,
Even if that means stepping away for a while from the ones that care about me now.
I know you'll be upset but this me.
The me that wants to move past you,
For a reason that I can barely make into words without my heart wanting to break.
I loved you once and I love you still but that love I feel is changeing.
I hate to say it but I've fallen for another right in front of your eyes,
The eyes I used to stare in for hours and feel at home,
The eyes that took my heart and locked it away,
The ones I hope that will still be there for me later on when I need it.
I have yet to touch him with my bare hands but the want is beyond that I've ever felt,
Beyond that I thought I could come close to feeling in my life possible,
My thoughts could barely comprehend what had happened to me so quickly and fiercely.
I have yet to see his eyes with my own but I know I'll feel at home,
I know they will care and feel the same as I do,
The same as you once did and say you still do.
Know that my love will never die and I will stay as long as you'll have me.
I've made mistakes and I wish to compensate but I must do something for myself.
My time is here to come as soon as I can.
I want to lay in his arms and night,
The want to hear his heart beat against my ear,
To listen to the breathing of being alive,
The warmth against my cold body from my time,
And see the eyes the reveal another world to myself.
I know it sounds crazy of the things I say but the words that come out are of that of my mind and heart.
I've always been crazy but that will never change.
I need this change or I will lose myself in what's been done.
I ask for you both to be by my side for I can't do it on my own,
On my own I'm a mere nothing in a dark void of my mind.
Both coming from the darkness,
Yet both to shead a light on me,
And I a light and shadow to them.
I want him to be my darkness behind me to watch my back to feel the warm embrace of protection,
But also for him to be a light and keep me on the path I need to go,
But most of the warmth of a love that I know will not die past the bodies we are in.
You've made a mistake my love and hurt my trust but forgiveness will come in time,
I need time and so do you but we can do it together.
Together we'll make the world we dream of a reality and turn it into Truth for them all to see.
You will have those beside you and I will have mine.
The best of being together.
My love will never die for you but if needed I will for you too.
I hear your words more then some know,
Possibely more then you know.
I know some all to well of saying them myself.
We'll make it together...
Makeing it Our World...
Our Truth