Wow...It's been forever since I've written hasn't it? Long story short, life has gotten sucky. I started dating one of my best friends October 17...6days later, one of my friends committed suicide at my school. She is dearly missed. New Years was sucky, spent it w/ my (ex)bf, and some friends. We broke up February sometime....it was just so awkward for me, yet no one understood that >.< We didn't talk for about 2weeks after that, during which time he started dating one of my friends who pretty much hates me now. They broke up after a few days, and me and him started dating sometime again...broke up not to soon after cus it was still awkward especially since we barely talked before we dated again. Now we ain't talking at all and I have no idea what to do. I wanna cry because I've lost a great friend all because of one little mistake, but I don't wanna cry because sometimes I think maybe he wasn't worth it at all. Either way, he's promised me one last thing, not to tell anyone about Micheal (guess I'll have to tell y'all sooner or later...but it ain't pretty)
I went to the beach for spring break with Jamie and it was torture. We stayed w/ my grandma and she hates my guts. So does her youngest daughter (oldest is my mom) so yeah. Her son-in-law (aunts husband) creeps me out so much, he rarely talks, just sits and sleeps and stares at me a lot...I always hate going. But my cousin is cool so it was ok...but I rarely got to see her cus she was stil in school and everytime we went somewhere, she was still in school. I'm trying to adjust to the cold again, it's hard. We lost an hour before we left, then lost another hour, and now gainin an hour back.
I'm scared to sleep cus I usually have nightmares. Micheal is probably coming back and I dunno what to do cus he'll stay with my dad and I go over there a lot. But I guess i gotta face him sometime. I'll put this short, in a way, Micheal raped me...he's also my brother. I'll explain another day seeing as how I've got a lot of other things on my mind at the moment.
Maybe I'll talk to my friend Jacob later, he usually can cheer me up...if he'd text back that is. But w/e...I think I've written enough. Mom's prolly gettin up soon so I can't be typin this when she does or I'm dead meat...just the family punching bag...loved by few hated by all.
♥Jaclyn JK
Oh and before anyone says anything...I'm not going to counciling or a therapist cus 1)I hate talking to new people cus of Micheal 2)They'd tell my mom everything i say and 3)I got no way to get there w/out askin my mom
 Coco_Bunny23 · Sat Mar 21, 2009 @ 07:01pm · 0 Comments |
