When having a job really pays
Lots of cash in your hand
And far away from this merry band
Every year Mom makes turkey
Which ends up like beef jerky
Tough and stringy, hard to chew
Just like the pumpkin stew
She forgets Christmas isn’t Thanksgiving
And most of the food is still living
Dad’s a nutcase all his own
A faux gentlemen, complete with cologne
A suit made by Marie Claire
Nose high, an aristocratic air
He forgets he’s just a janitor
Not some high class entrepreneur
Don’t get me started on Grandma and Grandpa
Whose size alone will leave you in awe
Red and green is their theme
But its nothing compared to their army regime
Drill sergeant “Attention hut!”
Can’t bust a move to save their butt
Last come Aunty Sara, Uncle Dan and Cousin Lenny
They all act like their twenty
A kiss here, a giggle there
A family audience, but what do they care?!
Little Lenny’s only ten
And imitates grown men
And then there’s good old normal me
A girl who likes the color green and shopping sprees
And then
There is the rest of my family
Shall we recap?
Mom thinks she has a cooking degree
Dad scents the house with awful potpourri
Grandma and Grandpa rule by the book, page by page
And Aunty, Uncle and Cousin just don’t act their age!
Oh god
I wish I had a job
