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I love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him but jesus i do some really stupid things sometimes i don't mean them but i do them anyway and i don't know why i do them but i stopped though i did after i thought about it and i committed myself to him and then it seemed like he started pushing me away and it scares me so much because i'm not there with him and i can't be with him all the time and he might be falling for someone else who the hell am i kidding he probably has after everything i did i drove him away from me i deserve what ever i get or maybe i'm just thinking too hard thinking about these things i need to go to sleep and just relax