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My zombie speech!
Ok guys, I've had a couple of requests to send my zombie speech to you. Instead of sending off a s**t load of PMs I have put it in here to show you all. ~enjoy.
Speech
How to survive a zombie attack.
Opening statement:
Hello ladies and gentlemen, today I am going to tell you about on of the worst potential crisis's to ever hit the earth. Nothing like a modern day crisis, like terrorism and global warming. No, today I am going to talk to about zombies.
Vicious, rotting, moaning zombies that prey on the living. How would you possibly survive such an ordeal? Well, ladies and germs; I am going to tell you.
First of all; what makes a zombie? How does a freshly deceased person, re-animate into a hideous monster with human flesh on its mind? The answer is simple: A virus. The zombie virus or its proper name Solanum travels from the entry point through the bloodstream and straight into the brain. There it shuts down all bodily functions and then the body is rendered dead. The virus then mutates the brain into a completely new organ and the human reanimates into what we call a zombie.
Ok, Time for some role play. Let’s say that you have just gotten bitten by a zombie. Let’s go through some of the excruciating symptoms you’d have to endure:
Hour 1: Pain and discolouration in the wound area (brown-purple).
Hour 5: Fever (37-39 degrees C), chills, slight dementia, vomiting, acute pain in the joints.
Hour 8: Increased dementia, loss of muscular co-ordination and increased fever (39-42 degrees C)
Hour 11: Paralysis in the lower body, overall numbness and slowed heart rate.
Hour 16: Coma
Hour 20: Heart stoppage: Brain activity is nil.
Hour 23: re animation
So, in short; it would approx. be a day for a healthy human to die and change into a zombie.
Solanum is 100% fatal and because it is a virus, little can be done to help a person that is already infected. Antibiotics are useless because they only target bacteria and immunization would be fatal. Fortunately for the human race, Solanum is neither air bourn nor water bourn. It can only be contacted via fluid contact.
Ok, now we know how is created. How do we destroy it?
Te brain of a zombie is the thing that made it; it is the thing that will destroy it. Remember: the only way to kill a zombie is to destroy the brain.
A shot to the head is probably the best way to kill a zombie, but if you are I close quarters a knife or anything else that is sharp will do fine. What you have to do is aim for either the eyes or the temple. These are the biggest weakness points on the head and will get a brain hit most of the time.
I cannot stress this enough DO NOT kill a zombie with fire. Tell me ladies and gentlemen what is worse than a flesh eating zombie
I’ll tell you: a flesh eating zombie on fire!
To conclude I would like to outline some important things to remember in a zombie invasion:
1) Organise before they rise.
2) The feel no fear; why should you?
3) Use your head: Cut off theirs.
4) Blades don’t need reloading.
5) Get up the staircase then destroy it.
6) Keep moving, keep low, keep quiet, keep alert.
7) No place is safe; only safer
8 ) The zombie may be gone, but the threat lives on.
Thankyou.
To those people who know where I got this info from.... stfu.
mad
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