Fake
Death gazes its glare at me
My weak and dieing soul he can see
Ready to die yet still fighting it
I fake a smile though it dosn't mean s**t
Act as if I am happy for those around me
For this pain inside I do not want them to see
Slowly it kills me day by day
From death's path i can not astray
Needing someone that can not be mine
My cheer I once had will not shine
Until I hold her in my arms to call my own
This fake smile shall be forever shown
Confusion
Fear of life not of death
Of what i am and what i will become
Not knowing what is beheld for me
Things happen all to confusing
Love toying with me in it's twisted ways
Depression settling in once agin
Putting up with the same bullshit
As I did before, confusion bout the ones i love
I dont know what to do anymore
Or how to feel
Will somone please reach out a hand
To help me out of this hole i am in
Explain things to me
Why thing turn out the way they are
This shall always be a mystery to me
The Void
Heart ripped out but still beating
Still in your hand, warm and bleeding
Once in love, now left in the dark
Wounds still open, shall leave your mark
With my feelings you have toyed
Leaving me an empty void
Chain less mind to an empty soul
Leaving my love dark and black as coal
Never shall these fatal wounds heal
Slowly this pain, I it shall kill
My Friend
Hello my friend, I greet you once again
Always there for me with a loving grin
To make me smile when life has got me down
With you it is hard to keep a frown
Times we share and the ones to come
Keeping me from the choices that are dumb
I shall cherish them forever in my mind
How you have always been there o so kind
Hopefully our paths shall stay intertwined
Always friends not leaving the other behind
But time shall only tell how we stay
If we continue friends or drift away
One thing is for sure my dear friend
In my heart you will stay till my life comes to a end
Dreams Of You
Once upon a dreary dream
Thoughts flowed through like a steady stream
Me and you were happy together
Our loved would last forever
In this dear dream of mine
Glad we were life was prime
We spent many a time with each other
Saying "I love you" with out a bother
As the dream went on it seemed so real
You next to me I thought I could feel
I held your hand within my own
Everywhere we go our love shown
I grew happy in this dream land of mine
Were everything was good and seemed fine
Then when our lips at last were to touch
Your being began to fade from me very much
I reached for you but all was lost
This dream was ending my happiness at cost
As everything passed by in a furry
My eyes opening making sight blurry
My eyes open wide and it comes to sight
That it was all a dream in the dead of night
With this awakening my happiness ends
And from my own mind I must defend
In that dreamworld I wish to stay
For I am happy with you I must say
For in this real world I call a home
No longer are we together and my heart must roam
Help Me
Sorrow and darkness consume my will
I know not what else life will deal
I try to hide these feelings inside
But my rules they do not abide
Death crosses my mind along the way
For my troubles I shall have to pay
In most people there is a light
With my dim heart it does not shine bright
All these lies and all this shame
I was always the one to blame
For I needed you then and I need you now
I look into your eyes and wonder how
How we ended up this way
And how much more I shall have to pay
But this torture shall never end
As long as with my love away you send
The whole in my heart shall never heal
Pain and anguish is all I have left to feel
I crawl through the night in search for a hand
But left alone here I stand
Missing you
As I sit here
Running threw my thoughts
All I could think of is you
And my endless love for you
As I sit here
All I wish now
Is to be holding you in my arms
And never letting go
Missing you hurts inside
But the thought of seeing you agin
Makes it all go away
Slow The Knife
Slow the knife
Increase the pain
To make all the sorrow go away
As I sit here
In the dark corner of night
Going threw the thoughts
Of my hallow life
I feel the blood trickle down
Like memories seeping out of my soul
Causing more pain
To make the old pain go away
My Hallow Eyes
Look into my eyes
See all my love consumed by darkness
Look into my eyes
See my tattered and torn heart
Look into my eyes
See all the pain and suffering
Look into my eyes
See all the turmoil and agony
Look into my eyes
See that I am nothing
Look into my eyes
And see that they are hallow
Alone
I lay here alone
Rotting in the ashes
Of my dead forgotten life
I reach my hand out
In hope for help
I sit up
Just to collapse to the floor agin
I hear the footsteps
Of death as he draws near
Out of the eternal darkness
My soul is drug off
Into ever lasting pain
And I am left there
To rot forever more
Death
Suicidal thoughts run threw my head
If i were to die now
Would anybody care
Would anybody notice
Would anybody cry
I doubt all these thoughts
As I slowly prepare to die
As I load the single bullet into the gun
I think of you
And all I should of done
I place the gun
Up to my head
Bang, its all over
And I am dead
As much as I love you
And as hard as I tried
I'm afraid this time
Death has won
And 2 songs I wrote xD
The Darkness
I sit in all this pain
(Wishing all these memories away)
My life is slipping threw my fingers
(As my soul seeps out)
I need you here now
(But I have been consumed)
I wonder here threw the darkness. Looking for a helping head.
I hear your voice calling but the darkness has blinded me.
I stubbles threw the darkness looking for you. But I'm afraid
this time (I'm not going to make it)
All the good times I have had
(Are all consumed)
Everything I thought and knew
(Has all been lies)
All I can do now
(Is bleed inside)
I wonder here threw the darkness. Looking for a helping head.
I hear your voice calling but the darkness has blinded me.
I stubbles threw the darkness looking for you. But I'm afraid
this time (I'm not going to make it)
All my life, all my pain, all my love, and all my shame, everything I have,
everything I knew, anything and everything
(Has all been consumed by the darkness)
Silient Suicide
All my life I've had nothing but torment and pain.
All those I love now fading away. All I seem to do now
Is ruin all there life's. Bring them sorrow as I slowly die on the inside.
The most knowledgeable thing now to do is to end it here to make there
life's better. For now is the time to (dieee)
(Chorus)
It is time for a silent suicide. End the pain end my life.
All I do now is cause others pain. So I shall end it here
never let out a cry. No one will know till it is too late.
For tonight is the night of my silent suicide.
(It is time for my silent suicide)
It is time to die
(It is time for my silent suicide)
Time to end this life
I sit here in my cold dark room, blade at hand. Questioning
myself. And were I stand. I pick up the blade and place it to
my wrist, and in a few seconds the blood it slowly drips.
I hold in my cries of anguish for no one to here. I die here
tonight. There is no turning back for the time is (nooow)
(Chorus)
It is time for a silent suicide. End the pain end my life.
All I do now is cause others pain. So I shall end it here
never let out a cry. No one will know till it is too late.
For tonight is the night of my silent suicide.
(It is time for my silent suicide)
It is time to die
(It is time for my silent suicide)
Time to end this life
I start to loose the feeling in my fingers and the blade falls
to the floor. I start to get dizzy and fall upon my bed.
The blood spreads across the sheets as the slowly turn red.
Everything starts to fade and thoughts run though my head.
And for the first time I start to regret for a thought of you crosses my (mind)
(Chorus)
It is time for a silent suicide. End the pain end my life.
All I do now is cause others pain. So I shall end it here
never let out a cry. No one will know till it is too late.
For tonight is the night of my silent suicide.
(It is time for my silent suicide)
It is time to die
(It is time for my silent suicide)
Time to end this life
I struggle to get up but it is already to late.
I don't wont to die now for I will never agin see you face.
Or tell you that I love you so with the last of my strength.
I cover my hands in blood and slowly spell out those three
words to you. Now I am done and can close my eyes
xixshmeexix Community Member 
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