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there's a story about a girl
it starts happy
then ends in misery
she always lied to herself
no matter how many times she was beaten
told she was worthless
left behind
she convinced herself she was happy
and she really believed herself
she became so happy
she was ready to end her life
but then she meant him
the guy that would change her
he showed her true pain, true misery, true love
she fell at first sight
she wanted him more then death
cared for him more then she cared to lie to herself
loved him more then love itself
sadly he loved her back
or so he said
pretended he cared and never shared
gave her hope like no one could
but used her up till she was lost for good
left her over and over
came back when he needed a shoulder
eventually she died inside
she was willing to give him her all
one day she realized
he'd never what her like she wanted him
he'd never care like she cared
he'd never see her as perfect as she sees him
just because he doesn't love her
so, she gave up
gave up on the hopes of him and her together
he lost her
she lied and said she didn't care
he cried and blamed
she apologized but only for his shame
she turned
left him to blame
she hurts but still lets go
he loses and never will know
she'll always be his
willing to give her all
if he was only willing to let go
and fall
- by need_A_freind |
- Non Fiction
- | Submitted on 11/05/2009 |
- Skip
- Title: her stoery
- Artist: need_A_freind
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Description:
i fell, i hurt, but i will let him go
just wish he could know - Date: 11/05/2009
- Tags: stoery
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Comments (7 Comments)
- Metis from the Abyss - 02/27/2010
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I'm assuming this is free-verse poetry, mostly. Rhythmically, there are a few issues. "It starts happy" needs a few more sylables. The lack of the shift key irks me somewhat.
Thematically, is misery actually love? I doubt it.
Oh, and to Volleyball luvr, try me. How can you hurt me, exactly? Internet threats are silly and make you sound quite immature. - Report As Spam
- Mochachiiino - 02/13/2010
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This flowed well, i liked it lots
Just read it over and fix some stuff. (But then she "Met" him) (He never "wanted" him like she wanted him)
5/5 - Report As Spam
- Nocturnal Sapphire - 11/28/2009
- but big sister its good
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- Nocturnal Sapphire - 11/28/2009
- whoever is reading this better not say ANY CRAP about this or i will personally hurt you
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- skyxxlullaby - 11/10/2009
- vary good
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- dovelover321 - 11/07/2009
- cool, very serious...and long. i think it is a good piece of writing
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- Ziggy the Blue - 11/06/2009
- Nice. Very deep.
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