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Yeah, this is going to be a bit of an emotional entry so if you don't want to read it, feel free to stop now.

Well for the past month I have been dealing with this stalker-like guy, he made harassing phone calls, online threats and even had this one girl hack and take over a few of my Yahoo acounts. It wasn't until last week when it intensified and actually ended. The Monday before this past one was when he locked my accounts and had his friend take over, that's when I IM'd my ex, J.D. J.D and I went out for a year but he broke up with me and yeah, anyway, I turned to him for help. He advised me to report it, gave me the necessary email adress and such and we started getting closer again.

Sadly, The Stalker had his friend who took over my account to tell J.D all these lies and even worse he believed her. He promptly started telling me that I was out of his life and that he never wanted to talk to me again. Also, he had told me that while him and I were having the conversation, he got together with another girl. This was the worst thing to ever happened to me because I cared deeply for him, and still do. We actually talked some on Easter and some Monday but yesterday he was ignoring me and I have no idea why. Last night I was in my room watching television and this one show came on. It was talking about getting over ex's and all. All these memories came flooding back. I miss hearing his voice, hearing his laugh..But now all that is gone. I'm never going to get that back. It feels like I'm never going to find someone else who will love me like he did, to be able to get close to them. We went through alot of stuff that year when we went out, we always managed to say together but how is it possible that someone, a complete stranger nonetheless, can cause us to never be able to get together again? I don't know wether to cry my eyes out or rip my hair out of my skull from the anger and frustration.

Last night was the first time in forever that I cried like that, everything I felt at the moment was just washed away by the tears. But now the pain is back, and I have tears in my eyes once more. Sometimes I wish I could just forget about him and move on so I wouldn't have any memories of him to make me sad. I never knew that it would be possible for us to dislike each other, or to grow this far apart especially after we were FINALLY getting close again...It's just not right..Bitching about it won't help matters, I know but I do feel somewhat better getting all this out instead of keeping it held inside..Thank you for reading this, it's good to know that I was able to hold your attention with my dramatic situation..v__v </3