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Damn it! Why am I so Stupid!?!?! |
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Damn it! Why do I have to put myself in situations like this? I ******** cause crap to happen! It had been a good day, and I managed to ******** it up!!!!! *sigh* I... I was trying to hold stitch, and his claws were SO sharp, putting cuts all over my arm, so, I tried filing them, and it was working! Then my dad suggested I tried just some nail clippers, so, I did, wearily because I knew... I knew, that if you cut it too far it can make them bleed, and at that point, it won't stop on it's own, and they can easilly bleed to death. So, I trimmed the sharp tips off two of his toes, and it was going fine. I trimmed another, and it too was fine, I put the tiny piece of his tallen on the table, and when I looked back up, stitch tried to get up on my hand, and then there was blood. I thought, out loud, "Oh my god. I REALLY hope that's my blood..." but it wasn't... it was stitch, the tip of the toe I had just cut was bleeding. I started to cry, and almost began hyperventalating... I had NO idea what to do.... I took a paper towel, and fruitlessly tried to stop the bleeding, and clean up the drops that were on the table... My dad suggested corn starch, Adam called karen.. Karen said to use corn starch, to put it on his toe, and then use a burnt mach to rub it in, to help the blod clot, stop the bleeding, so that it can start to heal... I did that... but I still can't help but cry. I'm worried that it might start to bleed again, and what if it's tomorrow while I'm at school?!? No one else can handle him without stressing him out, and that would only make it worse! And what if no one noticed, my bird could pass out and die while I'm standing by, having lunch with my friends! And I did that too him! It's my fault! It'll be my fault if he dies, no excuses for it! No exceptions! My fault... crying
 Sellesion · Mon Mar 22, 2010 @ 08:10am · 0 Comments |
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