"How can I say it so she'll understand?" Have you ever caught yourself thinking this? I really do like my best friend. She told me that at one time she liked me too but she had to push the feelings aside. She told me I should try to do the same but that's not how I am. I still have theese feeling for her. I always will she has been there for me for years so have others but....at school I am my friends ear and they can always talk to me. Kassie is like that for me. *long pause* I don't know any more there is too much stuff going on in my life. Here's a poem that half way pins what I feel.
Would Be Lover
By: M.A. Hamilton
Crystal tears from saphire eyes
A heart that bleeds but can not die
A love that hurts
For it's not returned
To be held tight and yet be spurned
My eyes are open but I can not see
You cast your shadow over me
Your lover for to truly be
Not just the toy you seem to see
The greatest of joys this would be
Would be lover you can't see
If you clam my heart I'll be set free
Forever more yours I'll be.
The poem was writen by my mom so you guys know. But the other half of what I feel is well described in Mariah Carey's song "We Belong Together". And this is what she wrote to me in return for what I wrote to her.
I got your letter. I'd write you back, but my mom refuses to buy stamps.... :/
Well sweetie, the angel doesn't fall far from the cloud. ;D
I knew you had a crush building up on me for a long while now, even when you didn't say anything about it. I know these things, darling.
I know how you feel, I had a point where I had feelings for you in this sense, I just had to block them out as hard as I possibly could. I know you say you "need" me and all, but it just can't be that way. You're a sister to me, I can't go out with a sister. D:
I've always felt we were as close as sisters, but I tried to stay semi-distant because I didn't want you to feel a love for me in this way, because if I hurt your feelings, I'd die inside.
Distance keeps a heart sore, but disposing of feelings makes a heart die.
I love you, nothing will change that. But I don't love you in the sense you want me to. I'm sorry, but that's how I want it to be. I could never go out with you because if things were to mess up, a break-up will be needed, and I can't do that to you. I don't want to lead you on, either. I'm sorry.
I will never ever cease our friendship. We're as close as it gets to me. I don't want to lose it. Don't take this as a "goodbye, our friendship is over". It deffinately isn't that way.
We're friends until the end, no stopping me there.
"If we were going out I would do the best I could to give you the world." Ambs, I'll give you the world, a shoulder, and a heart whenever you least expect it.
Amber, I love you. Never gonna change.
PM me back, I'd write this to you in a letter, but I as I said, my mom refuses to buy stamps. D:
And this is a pic I just got done of our avvies.
I love her. But in the end no matter what I say there are no words that truly describe my feeling tords her.
Kassie I love you.
 ~Rikku.Moonblade~ · Tue Jul 26, 2005 @ 01:12pm · 4 Comments |
