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A burning beauty
Its flames let out by emotions
Anger and grief
Nobody understands it
Its unique shapes and motives hidden by the horror
Nobody stays after death to see the rebirth
From its ashes, life forms alone
Its untamable soul wanders
Becoming more unpredictable
Eventually indestructible
The Phoenix arises
A fire burns on
sweatdrop
how was it?
sweatdrop
i kno... i suck don't i?
sweatdrop
no joke!
sweatdrop
- by Aris_Miyu_Phoenix |
- Poetry And Lyrics
- | Submitted on 04/03/2010 |
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- Title: Phoenix is my flame
- Artist: Aris_Miyu_Phoenix
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Description:
this was for an english assignment. i admit, it is HORRIBLE! but i wanted to post something! ^.^'' please be nice...
WARNING!
dont expect anything good...i almost failed english class almost 4 yrs in a row because of poetry! thank God i did not fail this year... - Date: 04/03/2010
- Tags: phoenix flame
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Comments (2 Comments)
- Aribis - 04/04/2010
- Thank you, ^ ^ I have a phoenix poem of my own but I haven't felt the need to post it...You have alot of potential, though
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- Aribis - 04/03/2010
- It's very unique. :3 However, to improve it, I'd read over it alot and see where it doesn't flow like you'd like it too. Right now it's very choppy. When you figure out where the problem is, you could rearrange the words and make extra lines. It's good overall, but lines 5-6 need work and break it up...Hope that helps. Comment mine?
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