• You once said that my hair was so soft and my eyes so beautiful. You told me I should wear things that weren't black. That night I went home and drug a blade across my inner arm, watching the line of color come to life. I called you that night "You'd be so proud I'm wearing red tonight"
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    We met in the rain in November and while hiding under the awning of Goretti High School I told you how I felt my hair looked like s**t when wet. You wiped the droplets from my cheeks with a side smile and said "I think you look pretty" After that I came to your house often with wet hair.
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    You taught me big words like Ignoramus and Rapturous. It was that year that I learned I was agoraphobic without you by my side. Now I look back on those times and think maybe it was just love not an anxiety disorder.
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    Your smile was rare but when it came I knew nothing could ever be more beautiful. Your eyes always told sad tales but those lips, oh they were darling. I remember I once was dancing wildly to cheer you up and fell face first into a brick wall. I walked home with blood dripping off my lips but a smile on my face just because it made you laugh and call me an idiot.
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    Slowly your joy was no longer towards me, just video games. You'd glance to me every so often then back to your game, and yet I always smiled. "Would you like me better if I played video games?" I spoke softly. You made a face, never taking your eyes off your game of 'Halo' and just gave me a soft "Meh" When I left your house that night I got right on eBay buying myself an XBOX
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    Your words became more harsh as the months went on and no matter what I'd apologize for everything, You called it a bad habit. I'm sorry for that, I'm sorry that I couldn't always make you smile, I'm sorry-- “Stop apologizing for everything,” you'd mumble while playing your bass "You can't change the world" I love you is what I should of said but I couldn't instead I whispered "I'm sorry" I guess old habits do die hard.
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    You once told me you kept me around because I never gave up, because even as you ran I always kept up. You said you loved me because I didn't try to change myself to match you like others girls. I guess you never noticed that every scar you had, I had sliced into my body too.
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    You left me without any words, I think you only regretted it because it wasn't your style. You most likely swore in your mind you'd leave with a bang, a bang so loud that you'd destroy my whole world. Instead there was only silence. I only say it was silence because my crying fell on death ears.