• The smile on my face is just a mask. Im scared of whats underneath. Shouldnt take off this mask, cant show weakness. Pretending to have forgotten the face that pulls me back. The image that follows me everywhere I go...hes never leaving. He's everywhere, everything, i cant escape him hes choking me. These bruises where my veins should be havent healed. A montage of memories weigh down on me, these tears ive been drowning myself in are pruning my heart. Its been small and shriveled up for 3 months and my mind is still stuck in that moment in time when you poured salt on my open wound. You told me you didnt want me, so I left with my head held high and without a word. You didnt expect that did you? You thought id put my mask on again and smile. Well I didnt, I left you to erase you. Now you want me back because im not there. Scream and yell all you want but as far as im concerned your a stranger. Your mask fell and what was underneath suffocated me. You really are a fantastic actor my dear Judas, you can say the sky's purple and everyone will agree. I knew this from the begining but you grabbed me pulled me in, I thought Id resist but apparently I couldnt. But wen you showed me Judas I grew immune to your mind games. We were both frustrated. We couldnt breathe Judas....I opened the cage and flew away for both of us. I know your angry with me but it was for the best.....Its been a while since ive seen you, and im glad. But soon i'll have to, because no matter how hard I try you can't be erased, you exist. But i'll just live with your memory. Someday someone will cure me from you and make me happy, im in no rush though. So I'll put my mask on again so you can see me smile and move on. Whats underneath will stay hidden from you my dear Judas.