I'm Nothing But a Shadow

• Artist: Rian_Lena
• Description: Idk... I kinda wrote this a while ago and then forgot about it. And then i found it today and finished... So..... Yea.... Don't really know if this a rant or not.... Buuut I'll call it that cause I can.
• Date: 06/01/2009
• Tags: nothing shadow

I’m walking through school during the day, happy and emotionless, seeing but never hearing, numb to the world. I don’t like myself very much, never had a lot of faith in what I do either. I always expect myself do to horrible and I always feel worse when I do. I really want to be happy, join crowd and laugh with everyone else, but little masochistic me doesn’t want to do that. I don’t feel worthy of it. And I’m such a hypocrite because I try so hard to help the people I love help themselves, to let them laugh and smile like I should with them. But no, I only help them, never myself, I’m not worthy of anyone’s attention despite how I claw for them to notice me. I contradict myself all the time, always being a hypocrite. I scream at myself, cry for me, laugh at me, get angry at myself for just being myself. Because I know it’s never enough, I’m never going to be good enough. I’ll always be the shadow cast by the ones who walk before me. I’ll be lost in it, trying to find the way out, crying in disparity, calling desperately. Then slowly, I’ll fade away, my soft sobs nothing more than a distant echo. My friends will lose sight of me and I’ll soon turn into the shadow I was meant to be. Happy and emotionless, seeing but never hearing, numb to the world.

Comments

[Rian_Lena]

It's not a song, it's more of a rant that was worded oddly... And yea, I don't know real grief 'cause I've never had the pleasure of feeling it. My experiences are my own, whether or not I'll learn about grief through a third world only time will tell.

[Tenacious Thomas]

Alright let me try to be nice about this. You (a person) are stupid. This is just another emo song. Real grief writing comes from life! Go live in a third world then write sadness.

[Rian_Lena]

Aww.... But grief is a much more entertaining subject to write about. And besides. I have enough happiness in my life. This is more of a balance....

[secret33]

Ok! Enough with the sadness! Get some happiness in your life!