Gilzilla

• Artist: The Incorrigible Thalimon
• Description: This is a sequel to a friends comic in which he routs the Taliban by having them make a giant cheese carving of Abe Lincoln and the army finds him.
  Only 2 characters are the same, however S.S. guy and Tyler.
  
  As for the rest of the story, there's many swear words and it's written in a script like format. Likenesses to anyone living are done with consent from the person named. I hope you enjoy.
• Date: 09/22/2009
• Tags: gilzilla

Our story begins on a sunny summer day with a young man sitting on a hill looking about. The guy is about 6'2", Caucasian, 20 years old, brown hair with blonde tips parted down the center, wearing a red T-shirt with denim shorts.
(Young man): What a beautiful day, the sky is blue, the birds are singing and there are two dogs humping in the distance.
Suddenly and quietly a figure appears behind the young man. The figure is that of a man, about 6'3", Caucasian, and strongly facially featured, wearing a tux, black sunglasses, and has slicked back black hair.
(Mysterious person): Tyler your country needs you? Again.
*Sound of a hammer pin being cocked*
(Young man hereby referred to as Tyler): Where do you come from?!?!
(Mysterious person): My parents… and the government.
(Tyler): Oh… Wait! That is not what I meant!
(Mysterious person): The whole Taliban thing was just a cover up.
(Tyler): You mean I did that for nothing!!!
(Mysterious person): No we made a fortune in oil.
(Tyler): Oh, I’m not doing anything like that again.
(Mysterious person): We could get you laid by Jessica Alba.
(Tyler): OK!!!!!
(Mysterious person): I’m here to brief you on your mission.
He pulled the sleeve up to reveal a wristwatch T.V. that looks like an old RCA TV. With the knobs and rabbit ears (antenna)
(Tyler): Hey where can I get one of those?
(Mysterious person): Government Issue to all of us Secret Service people.
(Tyler): Damn!
(S.S. guy) Now pay attention.
A picture of a footprint similar to that of the T-Rex in Jurassic Park appears on the screen of the watch. And the voice of the S.S. Guy is read over it.
(S.S. guy): This footprint was found at the World trade center sight.
The picture on the watch changes to an old Godzilla like movie.
(S.S. Guy): This is what we suspect did the damage.
The watch picture changes to a police line up of three people. One is about 6'2", male, about 20, Caucasian, and has on dark sunglasses, a black shirt, Black denim hat, jacket, and pants. The next in line is a person is male, Caucasian, 6'2", and wearing a loud shirt and denim pants, and "just got out of bed" hair. And the final person is 5'9", Asian, with black hair in spikes, wearing a shirt with the Target logo on it, dark blue slacks, and a name tag that says Chiew.
(S.S. guy): These will be your comrades.
A finger appears over the first person.
(S.S. guy): This is Scott Boston an explosives expert?
The finger moves to the next person.
(S.S. guy): This is William Gilbert, A.k.a. Bildo; He is the most annoying person in the world.
The finger moves to the third person.
(S.S. guy): As you can tell this is Cheiw. He is the easily expendable one.
The S.S. guy rolls his sleeve back down and the watch is covered and the camera is back on Tyler and the S.S. guy.
(S.S. guy): Most of them will die.
(Tyler): COOL!!! So when do I leave?
(S.S. guy): You leave in 1 hour. I'll give you a lift to the airport where your team is waiting.
Tyler arrives at the airport and his crew is already on the commercial airliner. He boards and sits next to Bildo on the plane. The plane takes off. And at 30,000 feet Tyler is listening to music (Punk rock), Bildo is giving away the ending of the in flight movie, Chiew is eating the airline food, and Scott is suffering from the airline food in the bathroom. *Poot*. Suddenly the scene shifts to the outside of the plane. There is a man standing on top of it. The man looks like Rod Serling and has his uncanny ability to be anywhere and still have his hair and suit not move in wind.
(Strange man on the plane): These four people on a mission to New York to slay a monster. Though they have got on a plane headed strait towards the?
A bird hits him in the face and he falls off the plane crying in pain. The bird survived. No one seems to notice or care. The four arrive in New York and get off of the plane take luggage, they did not bring any so they take other peoples and hide them, and leave the airport.
(Bildo): Let's go sight seeing!
(Tyler) Ok.
Three take off I a cab to see the sights of New York City. Though Scott stays behind no one seems to notice.
(Scott): Now to get my explosives. He he he, Ha Hahahahahaha. Wait why am I talking to myself? Quiet You!
On the other side of town the taxi speeds toward and past the Brooklyn Bridge and towards the Empire State Building.
Back with Scott he is at the Empire State Building and has his explosives. He sets them up mumbling to himself about his time with Bildo. A taxi pulls up and Tyler Chiew and Bildo get out of it and pay the driver.
(Chiew): Wow look how high this thing goes. If I could get that High…
(Scott): ... and damn that kid was annoying!!
Scott runs and presses the detonator button. An explosion is heard and the Empire State Building begins to fall toward Tyler and the rest.
(Tyler): RUN!!!
There is a panic in the crowd and all of the people save one are out of the slowly falling buildings way.
(Chiew): NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
(Tyler): Chiew! Run you idiot!
Another building close by stops the falling building.
(Chiew): Phew
The Empire state building's top breaks off and the rest falls at an incredible rate.
(Chiew): NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
(Tyler): Chiew Ru...
As he spoke the building crushed Chiew. Leaving only Chiew's arm.
(Tyler): Oh well he was gonna die anyway.
Scott looked at his handy work hoping that Bildo was crushed.
(Scott): Damn He didn't Die!!
Scott walks over to Tyler and Bildo. Tyler turns around and looks at Scott and realizes he had not been with the group.
(Tyler): Did you see that?
(Scott trying to sound inconspicuous.): What?
(Tyler): The Empire State Building crushing Chiew.
(Scott still trying to sound inconspicuous): Oh, that no.
(Tyler): Oh, Where have you been?
(Scott): Here and there.
(Tyler): Oh, Ok then this must have been the work of our suspect.
(Bildo): We should split up and search for it. I call Scott for a partner!
(Scott): Wait? I don't think this is a good idea.
(Tyler): Well he has a point we can cover more ground if we split up.
(Scott): I meant the runt goin' with me!
(Tyler): Oh well He called you for a partner and you will have to deal with it. I'll go alone.
Before Scott could argue Tyler had put on his headphones and began walking.
(Scott): Damn it!!!
A passing maniac walks by. He is 6’; light Black, with a shabby looking shirt on and new blue jeans.
(Maniac): We all gonna Die the bombs is comin'!!!!
(Bildo): Hey Nick.
The maniac indeed was Nick Fisher-White a friend of Bildo's in High School.
(Nick): Oh, hey Bildo. We all gonna Die the bombs is comin'!!!!
Now back to Tyler who has been walking for about three hours.
(Tyler): Wow that is more than I walked in a month.
(Voice in the dark): Really?
(Tyler): Yes.
Tyler looks up to see whom he was talking to and discovered that it was a person in a Godzilla Halloween costume without a mask. About 6'4", 260 lbs., fat, and White.
(Tyler): Who are you?
(Person in a Godzilla Halloween costume without a mask): I'm guessing the person you must destroy.
(Tyler): No I'm here to destroy a huge monster about 20 ft high. Anyway how did you...?
(Person in a Godzilla Halloween costume without a mask): I guessed and I'm often referred to that way.
(Tyler): Why?
(Person in a Godzilla Halloween costume without a mask): I can demolish buildings by leaning on them.
(Tyler): Wait I know you. Gilbert what are you doing here and I don't believe that.
(Gilbert): Well it's true!! And the name's Dennis.
(Tyler): No Way! Show me.
(Dennis): Ok.
Dennis leans on the nearest building, the area around them is to be converted into better housing so they are all condemned and evacuated, the building begins to crack, then to lean, and finally it falls over and Dennis falls on his face.
(Tyler): Cool! ... You know if there wasn't a loud BANG at the Empire state building I would have thought that was you.
(Dennis muffled by the ground): A little help please.
While Tyler and Dennis get away from the site, Scott has something sinister planed across town. But first a little side trip to our friend Nick. Nick is walking around the food quarter of Coney Island. He is shouting the usual things.
(Nick): We all gonna die the bombs is comin'!!
There he spies a young Asian couple with a camcorder. Some how in the inner workings of his mind he thinks it would help him get his message out to the masses if he stole the camera. So he acts upon those urges and steals the camera. As he is running he turns on the camera and shouts into it.
(Nick): We all gonna die the bombs is comin'!!
The Asians in the background shouting.
(Asians): Give us back our camera!!!
(Nick): NO!!
This continues until Nick trips and the Asians catch up to him and kick him. Here is some of that footage.
(Nick):We... *static* All... *static* Gonna... *static* Die... *static*
The static is from when nick accidentally presses stop and his face is in different pots when the camera comes back on. The pattern is just a fluke because he was defending against the Asians kicks. The Asians leave when Nick feigns a loss of consciousness. Nick runs away with the camera. Now back to Scott's sinister plan.
(Scott): Any last words runt?
Scott has Bildo tied to a chair in a shed full of explosives.
(Bildo): Yes, why are you doing this?
(Scott): Because I'm Evil!
(Bildo): You better come up with a better reason that that for leaving me here.
(Scott): That's it runt, you die now!!!
Scott runs out of the shed and leaves a trail of gunpowder behind him. He pulls out his pistol and fires at the trail. The powder ignites and is quick burning and reaches the shed in a matter of minutes.
(Scott): Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.
Back across at Coney Island. Nick sees the blast, which looks like a mushroom cloud and points the camera at it and shouts.
(Nick) I told y'all the bombs was comin'!!!!!
Tyler and Dennis on the other hand did not see or hear the blast. They made their way toward Central Park.
In Central Park the army waited. There was a three-stared general from the Air force there to oversee the op. He was about 6'1", White, Male, wearing a B.D.U., A name tag reading Wilson, and had a crooked nose (flat on the left side).
(Gen. Wilson): Get Ramirez on the line.
Across the state in a bunker was a military base on which a Lieutenant named Emanuel Ramirez was stationed. Ramirez is about 5'10" and Hispanic with short hair, a first lieutenant he at the time was sleeping in his bunk when an unfamiliar voice rang out to him.
(Strange voice): Wake up Mr. Ramirez the general wants to speak with you.
(1st lt. Ramirez): What? When? Who?
(Strange voice): The general wishes to talk to you.
(1st lt. Ramirez): Who are you?
Above him stood a civilian. He was about 6',White, chubby, with short curly red hair, and glasses.
(Person): I'm Daniel. The other person who was posted at the radio told me to take over, and that he quit.
(1st lt. Ramirez): Oh.
Ramirez walks to the radio and speaks into it.
(1st lt. Ramirez): Ramirez here.
(Wilson): It's about damn time!!!
(1st lt. Ramirez): What are your orders general?
(Wilson): The enemy is on his way and we want you to fly.
(1st lt. Ramirez): Yes Sir!
In the park there is a make shift landing strip for other pilots who got the same orders. Meanwhile elsewhere in the park a tank driver in the front is running over the infantry.
(Some soldier): Richard Stop!!!
The tank stops and a man open the hatch. The man is names Richard Trujillo. He is a 1 star general and a tank driver.
(Gen Trujillo): OOPS sorry Bill...
Just outside the park Dennis and Tyler were standing and looking at the planes takeoff, and a limo drive past. In the limo was Gen. Wilson but they did not know that.
(Dennis): Wow, look at all of them what do you think is going on?
(Tyler): Don't know. Let's see.
They walk into the park and are confronted by a man in a military B.D.U. with a nametag reading Verdugo and 2 stars on his shoulders and helmet. Behind him stood a line of fighting men and tanks. One of which held Gen Trujillo
(Gen. Verdugo): Who are you and what is your business here?
(Tyler): I'm Tyler and this is the person you were searching for.
(Gen. Verdugo): What?
(Tyler): I'll explain but first who are you?
(Gen. Verdugo): I'm General Byron Verdugo and I'm the one in charge here!
(Tyler): Oh ok. This is Dennis Gilbert and he has the Amazing ability to break buildings just by leaning on them.
(Gen. Verdugo): No way.
(Tyler): Would you like a Demonstration.
(Gen. Verdugo): Sure.
(Tyler): Alright but you must promise not to shoot.
(Gen. Verdugo): I promise.
Gen. Wilson exits his limousine and walks away towards the park. He had left his pipe behind. At the air strip in Central park Scott had made his way to a single plane left by the pilots. Earlier he had robbed a bookstore and got a copy of Flying for Dummies and decided to use it. He enters a plane and starts to read the section about military jets.
(Scott): Stick... Check. Canopy... Check. Seat... Check. Fuel... Check. Press start button and begin to pull back on the stick.
It continues like this and he learns how to fire all the weapons. Meanwhile Gen Verdugo pulled all fighters back except Emanuel's. No one knows why. Dennis and Tyler were standing beside a building picked by general Verdugo for their demonstration. This was a populated building.
(Tyler): Welcome one and all to the show of a lifetime. I've always wanted to say that. This man will before your very eyes demolish this building only by leaning on it.
Dennis readied himself for the task by moving beside the building in front of everyone. He leans on it, the building begins to crack, then to lean, and finally it falls over and Dennis falls on his face again. Tyler helps him to his feet. While others lie around in their rubble injured and one man shouts "MY LEG!!"
(Gen. Verdugo): Wow... That was amazing. Aim and fire!
(Tyler): You promised you wouldn't.
(Gen. Verdugo): That's right I did. Lower your weapons.
The men did as they were told. In the sky above flew Emanuel unaware of the danger he was in. Scott flew stealthily which they taught in the book. He flew fast to catch Emanuel. A voice comes over the radio. Ramirez recognized the voice. It was Daniel.
(Daniel): Emanuel Your not alone up there.
(1st lt. Ramirez): What do you mean?
(Daniel): There is someone on your rear in the radar and all the other pilots have been recalled.
(1st lt. Ramirez): What I'm the only one still flying. Hey I can see the general's house from here.
(Daniel): Forget that! There is someone behind you.
(1st lt. Ramirez): Oh right!!
He looks behind him and sees Scott giving him the finger. Meanwhile on the ground below Tyler is still talking with Gen Verdugo.
(Dennis): Thanks for helping me up.
(Tyler): No problem.
(Private): Sir there are 2 of our pilots Flying.
(Gen Verdugo): I thought I told them to land.
They all look up at the battling planes. Scott was firing on Emanuel with the machine guns. All the watchers on the ground in the park went to the Radio tent where there was radar and of course.
(Gen Verdugo): Well Ramirez, are you still there?
(1st lt. Ramirez): Yes.
(Gen Verdugo): Then fight back!!
(1st lt. Ramirez): Yes sir.
Ramirez’s plane at that moment was shot.
(1st lt. Ramirez): AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
(Gen Verdugo): We've lost Ramirez.
His plane was still on radar at altitude.
(1st lt. Ramirez): No you haven't.
(Gen Verdugo): Oh well What about now
(1st lt. Ramirez): Still no.
(Scott): This time I won't miss.
Ramirez was hit again.
(1st lt. Ramirez): Now I'm goin down!!
(Gen Verdugo): Now we have lost him.
Emanuel ejects and his plane hits Gen Wilson's limo. The limo bursts into flames and the group that was in the radio tent gather around the flaming limo.
(Gen Verdugo): He's dead. General Wilson is dead.
(Gen Wilson): No I'm not.
General Verdugo ignored the voice and o did everyone else. Emanuel lands safely on the ground behind a tree away from the rest. He looks at the carnage and sees that his friend Gen Wilson's limo was on fire.
(Ramirez): No not that. I killed him. I killed General Wilson.
No one noticed Emanuel.
(Gen Wilson): Idiots!! I'm still alive!!!
Tyler and Dennis look at him. Everyone else doesn't seem to notice him.
(Dennis): Brian?
(Gen Wilson): That's my first name. Who are you?
(Tyler): Long story.
At the base across the state Daniel looks at the radar and sees that Emanuel's plane has been shot down.
(Daniel): I must fly.
Daniel just happened to be a commercial pilot. He got in a vacant fighter and took off.
(Daniel): I hope I can get there on time
Back in the park, General Wilson walks away not wanting to spoil everyone else's buzz... and wanting to get some of what they were smoking. General Verdugo got a portable radio and switched it to the jet's frequency.
(Gen Wilson): Dumb Asses.
Scott now laughing maniacally in the sky kept flying.
(Gen Verdugo): I'm now truly in control. I am God!!!
At this point in the story I wish to tell you that he is not god, nor is anyone else on earth for that matter, so throw away your Alanis Morasett shrines now. Now back to the story. In the skies above Daniel had finally made it to New York. He found Scott laughing in the air above Central park. Daniel being a pilot used the radio to contact the General.
(Daniel with Scott laughing on his own radio): General I'm in pursuit of the madman. Should I engage?
(Gen Verdugo): What? Who are you? Who is the lucky girl? and why did you just alert him to your presence?
(Daniel): What?? Oh I get it.
(Scott): What presence?
Scott looks behind him to see another plane.
(Scott): Who is he?
(Daniel): See you in hell.
He pressed all the buttons in front of him with his palm. Hit the missile button and shot Scott's hind end off. Scott flat spun and ejected. The plane spun out of control towards the very spot where General Verdugo stood.
(Tyler): General you're about to be hit by a plane.
While Tyler said this he stepped back. General Verdugo laughed.
(Gen Verdugo): I'm about to get hit by a plane? Yeah right.
He laughs and laughs. As he laughs he looks up.
(Gen Verdugo): Oh, Shi...
The plane Scott had been in falls right on top of him.
(Dennis): Poor guy.
(Tyler): That's the third person I saw killed today.
General Trujillo opens the hatch to the tank.
(Gen Trujillo): That is the second Commanding officer I've lost today.
(Dennis): ... And Three generals in one place what are the odds?
(Gen Trujillo): What are the odds?
General Trujillo exits the tank and stands beside Tyler and Dennis. They stand and think for a moment. They notice a figure landing near them with a parachute. Tyler recognizes him and so does Dennis.
(Tyler and Dennis): Scott!
(Tyler): We must follow him!
They chase Scott and Emanuel who had heard all that was said follows them at a safe distance. Scott had quite a head start. He had dropped the chute a while back and he realized that he had left his gun behind also.
(Scott): Damn I need a new weapon.
Scott runs into a new pawnshop that was very conveniently placed. The rest lose sight of him at that intersection. They stand outside the store in wonder.
(Scott): I would like a gun.
The clerk pulls out a Walther p38, a colt 45, a semi-auto 44 magnum, and a Smith and Wesson Revolver.
(Clerk): Take your choice. They're all loaded.
Scott thought that the clerk was as well. He picked up the 44 magnum and looked at it.
(Scott): I'll take it.
(Clerk): That'll be $100.00 and you will get it in 6 weeks as soon as your background check comes through.
Scott pulls the hammer back and points the gun toward the clerk.
(Scott): I said I'll TAKE it.
The clerk wets his pants. He doesn't realize that he has the other guns in front of him.
(Clerk): Yeah sure.
Scott runs out of the shop. But let's back track a few seconds and join the heroes.
(Tyler): Where is he?
(Dennis): I don't know.
The door to the shop opens and Scott runs out, and into Tyler.
(Scott): Hey, watch where you're goin...
Scott looks at the person he bumped into and realized who it was.
(Tyler): Hey Scott. Which way did you go?
Luckily for Scott, Tyler was not that bright. Scott points left.
(Scott): That way.
(Tyler): Thanks.
Scott runs right and thinks that Tyler is stupid.
(Dennis): Hey, Tyler listen to your self.
Tyler closes his eyes and looks deep into his mind. There is a monkey in a Stereotypical professor's hat. The sentence Tyler just spoke on a chalkboard behind the monkey, and a desk in the middle of this vast emptiness. This was Tyler's mind.
(Monkey): You found Scott. You must catch him.
As the monkey says this he was pointing at the words written on the chalkboard.
(Tyler): Heh heh, Monkey.
Back in the real world Tyler actually said that last line.
(Dennis): What?
(Tyler): Nothing? Let's go after Scott.
Emanuel runs up out of his hiding and stealth.
(1st lt. Ramirez): What are we waiting for.
(Tyler): Who are you?
(1st lt. Ramirez): Emanuel, no time to explain. We have to move.
Tyler starts to run the way Scott pointed and then realizes that it is the wrong way and runs the opposite way. They follow him to a bridge. There's no traffic on the bridge. The only ones there are Tyler and his band of 3 and Scott.
(Tyler): There's nowhere to run to now Scott. We have you surrounded.
Scott looks around to his left and to his right. To his left Tyler and the others. To his right the other side of the bridge.
(Scott Sarcastically): Drat, Nowhere to go but down.
They really surround him while he says that.
(Gen Trujillo): Why did you do it Scott?
(Scott): You Really want to know why?
(All but Scott): Yeah.
(Scott): It's because of him.
He points to Dennis.
(Dennis): Who me?
(Scott): How quickly you forget. You were my partner. I paid you $300.00 to lean on a couple buildings so that I could put stuff under them. Those things were High-powered explosives, those buildings where the Twin towers.
(Gen Trujillo): That's not what I...
(Dennis): So that's why I saw the hologram machines.
Scot aims the gun at Dennis.
(Scott): Now if you would be so kind as to let me kill you I'll be on my way.
(1st Lt. Ramirez): No you won't.
He pulls off his shirt, jumps and does a Bruce Lee style dragon kick towards Scott. Scott gets hit in the chin and falls into the river below. As he is falling he is shouting NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
(Tyler): Wow can you teach me how to do that!?
(1st Lt. Ramirez): No but I can perform it on you.
(Tyler): No thanks.
General Wilson shows up with the rest of the troops from Central park.
(1st Lt. Ramirez): General Wilson, You're alive!
(Gen Wilson): Why wouldn't I be? I just went off to a bar. I was behind General Verdugo when the plane hit my limo. Poor poor driver.
(Gen Trujillo): Hey Dennis, have you ever given though of joining the military. They could a man with your talents.
(Dennis): Ok.
The S.S. guy appeared behind Tyler.
(SS guy): Tyler.
Tyler turns around alarmed.
(Tyler): Where do you come from?!
(SS guy): Here is Jessica Alba.
Tyler stares at her breasts.
(Tyler): Sweet!!




5 years later.

Tyler was last seen entering his home with Jessica Alba.
Jessica Alba was last seen entering Tyler's home.
Gilbert became a Demolitions expert in the military.
General Wilson Retired from the military for reason of rising stupidity in the armed forces.
General Trujillo Retired for the reason of falling planes.
Emanuel left the military to open a dojo and became the next Bruce Lee.
Chiew is still under the empire state building. No part of him was ever sent back. No one really cared.

Comments

[ShadowsJewel]

i cannot read plays very well but i like it