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"I'm finally in." Louluka Tsubonashi huffed. "After two years of excitement." Starr Academy has only students with starr abilities, just like Alice Academy. Loulu's is able-to-turn-into-a-leopard. She is ten, by the way. Here she is:]
She looked around the campus. She spotted her best friend.
"Imai! Hey, Imai!" she shouted, running towards her. Imai looked at her and smiled. Here's Imai:
]
Her real name is Imaikozubai Tamarekichai. She was with Daisuke Nakajima, her boy friend. Here is Daisuke:
]
She looked around. 'Where is Rich?' she wondered. Rich was her boy friend. He covered her eyes and said, "Guess who?"
"Uh... Richard." she said.
"Yeah, but keep guessing anyway." he said.
"Richard." said Loulu.
"Aw, I can't fool ya." he let go of her and grinned. Here's Richard:
]
She smiled back. Imai looked at her in fear. Loulu noticed.
"What's it?" she asked. Imai ran away. Daisuke looked too and nearly choked. He turned and ran too. Loulu looked behind her. A woman looked at her coldly.
"It's Arkellar!" Rich said. He grabbed her hand and ran.
"What was that about?!" she nearly shouted when he stopped running. He said he'd tell her later. The nezt day, Imai woke Loulu up... at 4:00 in the morning!!!
"Ahhh!!! Leeme lone!" Loulu yelled when Imai turned on the lights. Loulu got up and dressed. She frowned at Imai.
"Sorry!" Imai said. She suddenly grasped her head. She looked at Loulu in confusion. "I-I don't... who are you?" she asked. She fell to the floor, unconscious.
Read the next episode of "Starr Acadamy" soon!
- by Crying Angel 264 |
- Fiction
- | Submitted on 09/10/2008 |
- Skip
- Title: Starr Academy
- Artist: Crying Angel 264
- Description: Loulu is finally accepted to Starr Academy. But what's happening to the missing students?
- Date: 09/10/2008
- Tags: starr acadamy
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Comments (5 Comments)
- KellarRedfield - 08/02/2010
- I have to say its good but needs more details ok what i mean is What is Starr and Alice academy. Explain more details about the characters/ main character
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- OpheliacticCat - 07/16/2009
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okay, that kinda sucks
not as much of kinda, but REALLY.
1. not everyone knows what alice acadamy is!!!
2. bo-oring - Report As Spam
- Angelic_Devil97 - 09/12/2008
- i dont really like it lol
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- ChaiDreamLatte - 09/10/2008
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I will give you some critique here.
For one thing, what is Starr Academy? What kind of school is it? You have only described it as being for students with starr abilities, but I don't know what they are. Do they have powers of some kind?
For another thing, it is usually better to describe the characters than to give pictures. Another suggestion: Describe their personalities and some back story.
These are things you should consider for the next chapter.
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- Red_Mage_II - 09/10/2008
- Not everyone has seen or knows the anime/manga called Alice Academy so in order for readers to understand the setting, you are probably going to need to go into more details about the school, why the school exists, and why these people have abilities. Also, Imaikozubai does not sound like a real name. Imaiko, yes, but not the full thing you are using now.
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