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waking up with you next to me,
recognizable even under the labyrinth of tubes which surround you;
you’re merely in need of a surge protector,
not a surgery.
i find myself back in the waiting room
where sticky fists take custody of stubby crayons.
in your room, i could at least try
to make a song out of the dissonance of beeps
emanating from each closed curtain.
i have watched your body crack along its fault lines,
watched the squiggles of your successes
play tug-of-war
across the computer screen.
but the intricacies of infections seem so tangible
when i compare them to the transience of the
fleeting memories i have of you
asking if watermelon trees would grow someday
as you spat their seeds into the grass.
i look up at the fluid above your head,
forming endless droplets just before
they chase each other
into the coffee straws
which i am dismayed to find
are your veins.
- by lee and sweden |
- Fiction
- | Submitted on 01/31/2009 |
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- Title: the hospital never sleeps
- Artist: lee and sweden
- Description: I wrote this in my Intro to Creative Writing class in college. It was my workshop poem.
- Date: 01/31/2009
- Tags: hospital never sleeps
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Comments (7 Comments)
- this username is invalid - 04/23/2009
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I think that it is really good. And no, poetry does not have to rhyme or have the same amount of syllables or have idioms or similes or anything.
Its called free-form. It is one of my favorite forms of poetry. - Report As Spam
- Fancy twilightgirl101 - 04/16/2009
- it good and i hope u read my story called the cullen's funniest moments
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- Shiho Miyano is Ai - 03/14/2009
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there are elements of a poem lacking like
figures of speech,rhyme idioms.I think you need at least one of them to make it better
Also,for it to become a poem,it should have the same number of syllables per line or was it per stanza...
But,ite's a 5/5 - Report As Spam
- meerodi - 03/11/2009
- I't not really a peom so I think it's in the right section. Good jod biggrin
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- lucky -_- 13 pie - 02/26/2009
- you get a 5/5 ^_^
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- Gravetye - 02/20/2009
- 5/5 if I could rate it, I mean.
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- Gravetye - 02/20/2009
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Great poem. It's underneath the wrong section of the Arena, but oh well. This is incredibly well written. 5/5
Rate and comment back? - Report As Spam